Hi everyone! I'm new to this website having stumbled upon it while browsing the internet looking for information on visas/passports to get my boyfriend over to the UK from Turkey for a visit and thought it would be great to chat with people in similar situations and get advice and opinions which would be most appreciated before I make the drastic decision to move to Turkey!

I met a Turk while on holiday in Marmaris in June 2004 and have just returned from my fourth trip out to see him. The relationship has got to the stage now where he wants me to move to Turkey to marry him and make a life out there with him. I'm both happy and excited at the prospect but having read all the cynical stories - not just on this website but from the press, I naturally have my reservations as to whether I can trust him. I should add here that I'm a London born Turkish Cypriot so don't know if this makes any difference to the way he regards me and our relationship. My Turkish is quite poor having been lazy about learning it as I grew up in London but fortunately he speaks good English so we communicate in both.

He works in tourism selling day trips and excersions and I know this is really hard work with long hours so the prospect of a new life with a Brit with a bit of money probably seems a very attractive proposition. To me he isn't a typical Turk. There were no declarations of love after our first meeting, in fact I was despairing of him every saying he loved me when he finally uttered those 3 words over a year into our relationship! He said he wouldn't say such a thing until he felt it and meant it so I guess that goes in his favour. Also he has no wish or desire to come to London, hence why I'm contemplating the big move. He says he's happy in Turkey and thinks it's paradise although he's never been out of the country!

Am I foolish to think he's unique and has honorable intentions towards me? I guess I'll only really find out when I move out there but would appreciate your comments, advice and opinions - having read some of your comments to other members I know you guys can be brutally honest!

Look forward to hearing from you.

Afet, you are asking a difficult question. It's good that you are aware of the different things that happen around between men from Turkey and women from GB. I would say be on guard and test his love and patience. Use your wisdom to understand his behaviour and demand from him to make sacrifices for your relationship, that might help you understand how serious and committed he is. Apparently you have doubts, so something is not completely right.
It also depends how old both of you are and if you are ready to make a long term commitment.
If you WANT to go to Turkey to live with him, if this is what your heart desires without knowing that you are sacrifizing your education and happiness, I think it would be ok to go then. Relationship is always a risk to some extent.

My 5cents..... I worked in turkey this past summer with turkish boys....we worked in tourism so i can say a few words about those kind of guys. First of all, they all have a girlfriend from a foreign country but despite this they still go around sleeping with other girls. I talked to them many of times about this...they say they love their girlfriend and want to marry her and be with her, so then why do they go sleeping with other girls....they told me they have needs but that it is only sex with the other girls. OK, about the fact that he said I love you after a year, some of the guys when they pick up girls say I love you just to get them in bed obviously but others cant just say it which does not mean their intentions are pure. For me, I really like the guys i worked with and in their defense I truly believe they did not see anything wrong with it. One of the men was 50 and doing the same thing!!! I am no one to give advice. I am in a tough situations myself. I am dating one of those boys who I worked with and yes I have doubts but not because he gave me reason to doubt him but because of all the talk on this website. I think you do not need any advice. You know best what he wants and just listen to what your heart says it will lead you in the right direction. PS i want to move to turkey someday after i finish college....and i figure life opens many doors for us so we should take advantage of them and shit if it doesnt work out you can always go back to london or somewhere else.

i met my boyfriend on holiday
and he wants me to move to turkey and marry him.
like your bf he did not say he loved me strait away
and i think that is a good thing
i miss him like mad
i think that your b/f really does love you
bye


i miss him

and all this talk on all the websites, i agree, does make you worry
at one point i read so many bad stories i started to wonder if he really loved me, or if it was just because i am from another country
but now i am sure he loves me and i think that the people who have good experiances dont add antything to thses websites telling us about turkish guys i think its mainly only people who have had bad experiances
bye lol