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TO BE 40
(32 Messages in 4 pages - View all)
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1.       vineyards
1954 posts
 02 Oct 2008 Thu 10:44 pm

How does it feel to be 40?

In my case, by the time I could get used to the idea, I had already turned 41.

For younger people you are hopelessly old, for seniors you are still kind of young.

You are in between everything; no longer young but not too old either.

In those 40 years, you have witnessed a large scale transformation from the last remnants of patriarchal society into the information age. You can swear all the evil ways of humans are still intact. Despite all this development, nations are seeking excuses to fight. Terrorism is on the rise, the kingpins of yesterday have become barons of crime. The cities are less safe, families have long fallen apart. You are living among people who only think of themselves in a society run by money, greed and recklessness. How much of this can be personally attributed to me as someone who has existed in this society for the last 40 years?

 

The shadow of the past is still hanging over us. It seems we will never be able to get rid of ignorance, superstition and of politicians selling all this populist bullshit on the cheap. Just like Brutus did to Caesar or Judas to Jesus, our future is being sold by those whom we trust in. (e.g. Social democrats).

2.       libralady
5152 posts
 02 Oct 2008 Thu 10:54 pm

This made me smile! How about "Oh what it is to 50"...................... the distance between the two seem so short and suddenly you are staring 60 in the face {#lang_emotions_alcoholics} so enjoy life, you only get one chance .

3.       catwoman
8933 posts
 02 Oct 2008 Thu 11:59 pm

Well, I told myself some time ago "screw all this!". The world is f**** up and even if some details change here and there, the big picture will always be the same. I am very lucky to be safe, not hungry and have some chances to be free and independent. Everything else is a minor detail.

4.       geniuda
1070 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 12:19 am

 

Quoting vineyards

How does it feel to be 40?

 

 Let me get back to you in two more years ...then I will be able to answer {#lang_emotions_satisfied_nod} {#lang_emotions_razz}

5.       mltm
3690 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 01:54 am

a feeling that for the moment I do not want to know.

6.       catwoman
8933 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 02:14 am

 

Quoting mltm

a feeling that for the moment I do not want to know.

 

I doubt you will ever actually desire to know this, you will be cornered on this one! {#lang_emotions_lol}

7.       CANLI
5084 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 03:14 am

 

Quoting vineyards

How does it feel to be 40?

 

 

 Ã always think,you are as old as you feel in your heart.

Ýf you feel you are young even if you are 60,then you are young...you will be young,if you feel that you are old even if you are 20,then you are old.

 

Being 40,i havent experienced it yet,but also i think it would be good as being 20..i mean when you are teens you cant wait to be 20,and you feel many things changed and as if you own the world

Ýn 40,i believe its same to some extent,just you are mature enough to know you dont own the world,but also know and can own somethings in your hands and can make a difference to yourself and to others.

You are both mature,and young too

So i think its great ´will be inþallah i hope´

 

The one thing that im sure about,and have learnt it the hard way too,that at any age,i dont want to look back and say,i wish that if im teen,20,30,40,50...etc again so i would do...and ...

 

The lesson i´ve learnt ´try to get the best of it while you are in it´

Ý just wish i would always use that lesson well myself .

8.       catwoman
8933 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 03:35 am

 

Quoting CANLI

 Ã always think,you are as old as you feel in your heart.

Ýf you feel you are young even if you are 60,then you are young...you will be young,if you feel that you are old even if you are 20,then you are old.

 

Being 40,i havent experienced it yet,but also i think it would be good as being 20..i mean when you are teens you cant wait to be 20,and you feel many things changed and as if you own the world

Ýn 40,i believe its same to some extent,just you are mature enough to know you dont own the world,but also know and can own somethings in your hands and can make a difference to yourself and to others.

You are both mature,and young too

So i think its great ´will be inþallah i hope´

 

The one thing that im sure about,and have learnt it the hard way too,that at any age,i dont want to look back and say,i wish that if im teen,20,30,40,50...etc again so i would do...and ...

 

The lesson i´ve learnt ´try to get the best of it while you are in it´

Ý just wish i would always use that lesson well myself .

 

Well put Canli!

9.       Elisabeth
5732 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 07:06 pm

I try not to let myself think about my age because I agree with Canli completely.....you are as old as you feel.  I think its important to set goals for yourself often enough so that you are always trying something new.....in my opinion LEARNING is the key to staying young in your mind.  As far as my impact on the world.....I think my impact has been infinately small.  There is little I can do to make the world better/happy but I CAN effect my own immediate environment which I try to fill with laughter and good memories.  I think you could drive yourself crazy trying to fix the world.

10.       Trudy
7887 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 07:07 pm

 40 feels exactly the same as 39 or 41.

11.       Elisabeth
5732 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 07:09 pm

 

Quoting Trudy

 40 feels exactly the same as 39 or 41.

 

 But Trudy, I heard the sex gets better....is this true or a terrible rumor??????{#lang_emotions_lol_fast}

12.       Trudy
7887 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 07:13 pm

 

Quoting Elisabeth

 But Trudy, I heard the sex gets better....is this true or a terrible rumor??????{#lang_emotions_lol_fast}

 

Of course it get´s better - at least when you´re a woman. Simple reason: you have the experience and a young virile dudu..... lol lol

 

For men: pityful but frequent visits to a pharmacy for a new load of blue pills seems to be inevitable.... lol

13.       Elisabeth
5732 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 08:07 pm

 

Quoting Trudy

Of course it get´s better - at least when you´re a woman. Simple reason: you have the experience and a young virile dudu..... lol lol

 

For men: pityful but frequent visits to a pharmacy for a new load of blue pills seems to be inevitable.... lol

 

 {#lang_emotions_lol_fast}  I think that is just the justice of the universe!! 

14.       teaschip
3870 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 08:15 pm

I´m not 40 yet...however regarding the sex thing.  I found it interesting hearing the radio the other day.  Do you know what men call women in their 40´s going to bar´s trying to pick up younger men in the U.S.?  A cougar....   Then you have women who are just plain ugly and even though men have their beer goggles on, they won´t have anything to do with them.  They call these women three legged hyenas.  Women were calling in left and right...{#lang_emotions_lol}

 

I couldn´t believe my ears that men actually have these names for women..{#lang_emotions_unsure}.But then again we use the term "eye candy".  Any derogatory ones for men out there?

15.       peacetrain
1905 posts
 03 Oct 2008 Fri 08:32 pm

 

Quoting CANLI

 Ã always think,you are as old as you feel in your heart.

Ýf you feel you are young even if you are 60,then you are young...you will be young,if you feel that you are old even if you are 20,then you are old.

 

Being 40,i havent experienced it yet,but also i think it would be good as being 20..i mean when you are teens you cant wait to be 20,and you feel many things changed and as if you own the world

Ýn 40,i believe its same to some extent,just you are mature enough to know you dont own the world,but also know and can own somethings in your hands and can make a difference to yourself and to others.

You are both mature,and young too

So i think its great ´will be inþallah i hope´

 

The one thing that im sure about,and have learnt it the hard way too,that at any age,i dont want to look back and say,i wish that if im teen,20,30,40,50...etc again so i would do...and ...

 

The lesson i´ve learnt ´try to get the best of it while you are in it´

Ý just wish i would always use that lesson well myself .

 

 I agree.  Being 50 doesn´t bother me at all, especially when people think I´m 40.   .  My grandmother didn´t get a grey hair until she was 85 and mine is the same colour as hers was, so I´m hopeful

16.       ~daisy
4 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 12:05 am

I think that it is different for men than it is for women (since men would still be living in their 3rd or 4th childhood, and probably will never come out of it {#lang_emotions_lol})
Personally, it is about being able to look myself in the mirror and be proud of the person I’ve become, and looking ahead for the years to come.
What is ahead of you is certainly indefinite, but as Canli said, trying to get the best of it while you are still in it, is all you can really do.

But I wonder if I will still be feeling the same after one and a half more years!{#lang_emotions_shy}

17.       catwoman
8933 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 12:37 am

 

Quoting ~daisy

But I wonder if I will still be feeling the same after one and a half more years!{#lang_emotions_shy}

 

So you must be 38.5... {#lang_emotions_satisfied_nod}

18.       yilgun-7
1326 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 02:24 am

According to the new science and century, 50 - 80  is  the middle-age.

19.       Daydreamer
3743 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 11:02 am

Teas, cougar? Three legged hyenas? pmsl! lol I can´t think of any Polish terms for that but we have a saying pertaining to older women who desperately try to look young and dress like teens. It translates into something like "A high school in the back and museum in the front"

20.       peacetrain
1905 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 11:11 am

 

Quoting Daydreamer

but we have a saying pertaining to older women who desperately try to look young and dress like teens. It translates into something like "A high school in the back and museum in the front"

 

 In England we would say these women were "mutton dressed as lamb"

21.       lady in red
6947 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 01:57 pm

 

Quoting Daydreamer

but we have a saying pertaining to older women who desperately try to look young and dress like teens. It translates into something like "A high school in the back and museum in the front"

Quoting peacetrain

 In England we would say these women were "mutton dressed as lamb"

 

lol lol  - I like the Polish version better!!!! (not that either of those expressions would ever apply to me of course!!! - {#lang_emotions_wtf}  )

22.       erwin
3 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 04:02 pm

 

Quoting ~daisy

 (since men would still be living in their 3rd or 4th childhood, and probably will never come out of it {#lang_emotions_lol})

 

  {#lang_emotions_wtf} 

23.       vineyards
1954 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 04:08 pm

I remember two phrases which are kind of old now :

 

Minare cokmus ama mihrap yerinde

 

This one is used to describe an elderly woman who was apparently very beautiful when she was young and still carries glimpses of it. It literally translates "The minaret is gone but the altar is still intact." 

 

Hükümet gibi kadin.

 

Literally translates, "a woman who is like the government" referring to a woman who is not so young but impressive and dominant.

24.       Trudy
7887 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 05:03 pm

 

Quoting vineyards

It literally translates "The minaret is gone but the altar is still intact." 

 

 lol lol What a great way of saying!

25.       theapprentice
15 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 06:28 pm

they also say the older the fiddle the better the tune

 

I love being in my 40´s

 

they say old age doesnt come alone, although i prefer the term middle aged ... well in my eyes it doesnt it bring a real sense of confidence... and there are the other benefits.... you know all there is to know about your job, the morgage is paid and with any luck the kids are getting ready to leave home......ahhhhhhhh well i guess two out of three aint bad

26.       catwoman
8933 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 06:38 pm

All these phrases about women are quite disgusting. Especially when you consider the fact that half of the time they come from men whose backside possibly looks better then their faces. {#lang_emotions_puking}

27.       peacetrain
1905 posts
 04 Oct 2008 Sat 06:50 pm

 

Quoting catwoman

All these phrases about women are quite disgusting. Especially when you consider the fact that half of the time they come from men whose backside possibly looks better then their faces. {#lang_emotions_puking}

 

 There is a saying here when referring to an ugly person . . . he/she would have "a face like a slapped backside" or he/she looks like "the back end of a bus"

 

If someone looks unkempt we might say they have been "dragged through a hedge backwards"

 

I agree the phrases about women are disgusting and there don´t seem to be so many about men.  I can only think of:

 

anorak

 

anal

 

big girl´s blouse

 

and the collective noun "d**k heads   (excuse the language) which covers a multitude of traits

28.       alameda
3499 posts
 05 Oct 2008 Sun 06:42 am

 

Quoting vineyards

How does it feel to be 40?

In my case, by the time I could get used to the idea, I had already turned 41.

For younger people you are hopelessly old, for seniors you are still kind of young.

You are in between everything; no longer young but not too old either.

In those 40 years, you have witnessed a large scale transformation from the last remnants of patriarchal society into the information age...........

 

You seem to be talking about the age of 40 in a specific time, rather than the abstract 40. I think by the time one is 40 they have full responisbility for their actions. The excuse of being a silly wild passionate youth is gone.

 

I don´t feel a man is a man until he is 40. Dustin Hoffman had an interesting take on it. In an interview I saw of him once, he said that when he was young he couldn´t talk with a woman, any woman,  without thinking about sex. Now that he has gotten older, it was like getting a monkey off his back.

 

The arrogance of youth should have left by the time one is 40. I think men become more sensitive and vulnerable at that time. Their hair has thinned, they are getting a belly and they are more humble.

 

For everyone, physical prowess is dimished and death seems more real and nearer and one is more aware of it. By the time one is 40, a few friends or relatives have passed on. The seeming invulnerability of youth has gone, and we all realize we are not invulnerable. 

 

For women, the childbearing years, and all that entails, are coming to an end. A new meaning of life comes into focus. Many women begin new careers, as their children gain maturity.

 

It can be tragic to see a (physically) beautiful woman who has not learned to develop other attrubutes, come to terms with seeing her beauty fade. We all see that with the aged beauty queen with too much make up and too youthful cloths. Learning to age with grace is not easy in our youth enthralled society. There are few role models.

 

 

29.       catwoman
8933 posts
 05 Oct 2008 Sun 07:13 am

 

Quoting alameda

Learning to age with grace is not easy in our youth enthralled society. There are few role models.

 

Couldn´t agree more with this statement...

30.       peacetrain
1905 posts
 05 Oct 2008 Sun 09:31 am

 

Quoting alameda

You seem to be talking about the age of 40 in a specific time, rather than the abstract 40. I think by the time one is 40 they have full responisbility for their actions. The excuse of being a silly wild passionate youth is gone.

 

I don´t feel a man is a man until he is 40. Dustin Hoffman had an interesting take on it. In an interview I saw of him once, he said that when he was young he couldn´t talk with a woman, any woman,  without thinking about sex. Now that he has gotten older, it was like getting a monkey off his back.

 

The arrogance of youth should have left by the time one is 40. I think men become more sensitive and vulnerable at that time. Their hair has thinned, they are getting a belly and they are more humble.

 

For everyone, physical prowess is dimished and death seems more real and nearer and one is more aware of it. By the time one is 40, a few friends or relatives have passed on. The seeming invulnerability of youth has gone, and we all realize we are not invulnerable. 

 

For women, the childbearing years, and all that entails, are coming to an end. A new meaning of life comes into focus. Many women begin new careers, as their children gain maturity.

 

It can be tragic to see a (physically) beautiful woman who has not learned to develop other attrubutes, come to terms with seeing her beauty fade. We all see that with the aged beauty queen with too much make up and too youthful cloths. Learning to age with grace is not easy in our youth enthralled society. There are few role models.

 

 Beautifully put Alameda.

 

Dustin Hoffman has always been one of my favourites and he just seems to get better with age.  Robert Redford too. 

 

Personally, I´ve never worried about getting older but I´m thankful I´ve been blessed with good skin.  I´m also thankful that I´m not in the public eye.  I think celebrities are under so much pressure to keep up appearances, especially if they have been lauded for their good looks.

31.       catwoman
8933 posts
 05 Oct 2008 Sun 04:44 pm

 

Quoting peacetrain

 Dustin Hoffman has always been one of my favourites and he just seems to get better with age.  Robert Redford too.

 

I am not sure if this statement of his is so admirable. I think it´s much more related to the horrible sex education that boys are getting.

32.       peacetrain
1905 posts
 05 Oct 2008 Sun 09:18 pm

 

Quoting catwoman

I am not sure if this statement of his is so admirable. I think it´s much more related to the horrible sex education that boys are getting.

 

 Well, I wasn´t referring to his statement    But actually, if you´re talking about Hoffman then the tense should be past as he was talking about his youth.  I understand his comment to mean he has learned how to relate to women as he has aged, which means that whatever influences he had as a youth, they have been overshadowed by what he has learned as he lived his life.  Perhaps he actually listened to the women he met and learned from them.

 

As for his influences in his youth . . . I blame Mrs Robinson

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