rezzyrezzy,

you are right about women, you know sometimes it happens to men too, they get stuck in these abusive relationships and start believing all the crap that is either said to them or beat into them.  i´ve worked with domestic violence agencies and i´ve taken a lot of courses on gender and equality and otherness in contemporary culture.  there does seem to be something in the human condition that helps us get stuck in these horrible situations.  and i´m sorry you got "beat up" so bad on this site for your opinions had i known this site had continued on i would have come to your rescue.  i could´ve been your hero!

that being said, my soon to be EX-boyfriend was never hurtful to me.  just neglectful.  he helped me a lot with whatever i wanted/needed - it seemed to be a matter of pride for him.  in fact, he did most of the cooking, and some of the cleaning.  and i used his car whenever i wanted.  and he gave me money--not a lot.  i used to go out 2-3 nights a week without him.  he never said nothing.  he would encourage me to go out and have fun.  and he was the snuggle king!  and his was a very giving lover.

but it was more like i was his pet than his girlfriend.  he loved me like one loves a pet.  you provide for it, but really in the end it has it´s place.

i´m not sorry.  i had a great time and a shit time too.  all in all it was a grand adventure!  my first Turkish experience.  my first time in a muslim country.  i love Turkey!  it´s just a great place to be.  soon i will return to my real love - Turkey.

i hope you come back here, rezzyrezzy and see my post.  i´m going to be okay

Hi, i only gave up because i was getting so much flak, and it seemed to be a waste of time.  People will do what they want to do, regardless.  I hope you will find a fulfilling relationship, if thats what you want. Very few people do. cheers.

I have a Turkish partner and usually he likes to spend time with me. But we also (both) need some "buddy" time, we´re not attached to the  hip! It doesn´t matter if your boyfriend´s behaviour is typically Turkish or not. What matters is that it makes you feel bad, so you need to talk about it and change it! Try to find more things you can do together.

I had the same conversation with my boyfriend, since sometimes he has a hard time planning alone time for us. Taking me out together with family and friends is nice, but being together at times is nice too  He kept on inviting other people when I planned romantic outings for the both of us  We discussed it, and we found a middle way in which we both feel comfortable.