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yusuf and extra brain - part 1
(15 Messages in 2 pages - View all)
1 2
1.       yusuf :)
0 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 03:27 am

as i had promisedmy friends that my coming poem will be called yusuf and extra brain : lol
so this is it:

yusuf , yusuf and extra brain
if i share i always gain
what i do is not in vain
yusuf ,yusf and exta brain

yusuf yusuf and extra brain
turkeys love runs in my vein
....... to be contuied.....

sorry the rest of poem is under constuction
sorry friends,i didnt complete my poem yet , because poetry is just atranslation of feeling ,and my feeling these days r full of fear and sadness cause my final exam is next monday

2.       sanja_isyankar
457 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 03:42 am

oohhh ... im claping... and im waiting part 2...

3.       Kelsey
7 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 03:52 am

Ah, the first part of that was awesome! I can't wait for the rest...and good luck on your exam yusuf!!! I know you'll do great!

4.       Lyndie
968 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 10:57 am

Good luck Yusuf! I also cant wait for the rest of the poem

5.       Aslan
1070 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 11:09 am

...AlphaF has to be careful...there is a poet running up for the number 1 place as coolest at tc... ...can´t wait to hear the rest, lan!

6.       hanan
197 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 11:44 am

yusuf .keep on the good work , but extra brain( do u have two brains)

7.       Boop
785 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 12:48 pm

Great start Yusuf - look forward to the rest - your English is getting very good too!!

Best luck wishes for your final exam

8.       yusuf :)
0 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 12:49 pm

Quoting Lyndie:

Good luck Yusuf! I also cant wait for the rest of the poem


thank u lyndie so much, realy i feel so so happy when send me post and giving me your opion

9.       miss_ceyda
2627 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 01:32 pm

Quoting yusuf :


yusuf , yusuf and extra brain
if i share i always gain
what i do is not in vain
yusuf ,yusf and exta brain

yusuf yusuf and extra brain
turkeys love runs in my vein



good start
but i think that

"...and an extra brain..." would sound much better.


also, love of turkey would sound better

and i dont think vein can be used like this, i thnk it would have to be plural



sorry, im guessing that english is not ur first language hehe..
great poem though, well done..

10.       sanja_isyankar
457 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 02:06 pm

oohhh yusuf i think that girls likes u here on tc,but is that because of ur poems or something else????????????????
what is ur secret casanova???

11.       yusuf :)
0 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 02:31 pm

Quoting sanja_isyankar:

oohhh yusuf i think that girls likes u here on tc,but is that because of ur poems or something else????????????????
what is ur secret casanova???


you can know the answer from my poem its:

if i share i always gain

12.       Lyndie
968 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 03:43 pm

Quoting miss_ceyda:

Quoting yusuf :


yusuf , yusuf and extra brain
if i share i always gain
what i do is not in vain
yusuf ,yusf and exta brain

yusuf yusuf and extra brain
turkeys love runs in my vein



good start
but i think that

"...and an extra brain..." would sound much better.


also, love of turkey would sound better

and i dont think vein can be used like this, i thnk it would have to be plural



sorry, im guessing that english is not ur first language hehe..
great poem though, well done..



Now then Princess. You must not bury the creative muse by correcting the English. İf Yusuf starts worrying too much about this he will not be able to compose. İmagine how hard it is writing meaningful rhyme in another language! Let's not nit pick! His poetry is all the more charming for its small faults

13.       Deli_kizin
6376 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 03:47 pm

Quoting Lyndie:


Let's not nit pick! His poetry is all the more charming for its small faults



14.       shomath
13 posts
 23 Apr 2006 Sun 09:42 pm

good boy yusuf..you never broken your words..and realy we have "yusuf nd extra brain"well i'm going to complete it for you.what do youthink...and the money fifty fifty...don't worry..cuz i can't wait for your exam..this is boring..and maybe i'll have an extra brain like you.."shomath and extra brain" the new title of the poem..nice..

15.       miss_ceyda
2627 posts
 25 Apr 2006 Tue 12:00 am

Quoting Lyndie:

Quoting miss_ceyda:

Quoting yusuf :


yusuf , yusuf and extra brain
if i share i always gain
what i do is not in vain
yusuf ,yusf and exta brain

yusuf yusuf and extra brain
turkeys love runs in my vein



good start
but i think that

"...and an extra brain..." would sound much better.


also, love of turkey would sound better

and i dont think vein can be used like this, i thnk it would have to be plural



sorry, im guessing that english is not ur first language hehe..
great poem though, well done..



Now then Princess. You must not bury the creative muse by correcting the English. İf Yusuf starts worrying too much about this he will not be able to compose. İmagine how hard it is writing meaningful rhyme in another language! Let's not nit pick! His poetry is all the more charming for its small faults



im sorry :'(
i meant it in the nicest way possible..

i suppose also that the "small faults" you talk of do actually add to the poems "charm" you are right.. it also emphasises the message of the poem.. maybe ironic i dont know hehehe.. sorry.. i can be harsh...

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