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1.       nessah
744 posts
 05 Oct 2016 Wed 06:20 am

yes we have talked. and the first night on whatsapp we had a big fight.
we almost seperated. we cursed at each other.
u know, i hate that he is out at night. and he hates to be at home.
i dont know how to solve it. i just want a normal lover.
that has a job to go to at days. mature. not making me worried.
when he is outside at nights, I beg him to go home.
I feel stupid when I do that. becuz of course i dont want to
pressure him. of course he should be free. but if u love someone u must
do some sacrifices sometimes. dont u agree? if i was outside every night..
he would never accept that. or if i did something that bothers him.
when he is outside very late. i just sit at home and cry and wondering
wwhat he is doing. and i worry. i cant sleep. i wish that he would
understand.but he just get angry at me.
most of the time i just keep quiet and cry instead. it feels like something
is breaking inside of me. i tried to talk with him about it many times.
sometimes he became better. but only for some days. then its the same again.
anyway i dont know why im telling u this. i love him with all of my heart.
but if love is this much hard. then i would rather spend the rest of my life
alone. i cant see myself with someone else other than him. when i love someone,
i really love deeply and it doesnt fade away. sometimes i wish that i was a
cold person who didnt cared. everything would be easier. ok i will be quiet now.

2.       Celile
13 posts
 06 Oct 2016 Thu 04:11 pm

Evet konutuk ve whatsapptaki ilk gecemizde büyük bir kavgam覺z oldu. Neredeyse ayr覺l覺yorduk. Birbirimize küfür ettik. Biliyorsun, onun geceleri d覺arda geçirmesinden nefret ederim, o da evde durmaktan nefret eder. Nas覺l çözeceimi bilemiyorum. Normal bir sevgili istiyorum. Normal bir ii olan, olgun olan, beni merakta b覺rakmayan bir sevgili. O geceleri d覺aradayken ona eve gel diye yalvar覺yorum. Onu yaparken kendimi aptal gibi hissediyorum. Çünkü tabii ki ona bask覺 yapmak istemiyorum. Elbette özgür olmal覺. Ama birini severken bazen fedakarl覺k yapmak laz覺m, sence öyle deil mi ? Ben her gece d覺ar覺da geçirseydim o bunu asla kabul etmezdi. Yada onu rahats覺z edecek birey yapsayd覺m. O geç saatlere kadar d覺ar覺dayken ben evde oturup al覺yorum, ne yap覺yor diye düünüyorum ve onu merak ediyorum. Uyuyam覺yorum da. Keke beni anlasa. ama sadece k覺z覺yor bana. Çou zaman sadece sessiz kal覺yorum ve konumak yerine al覺yorum. Bazen içim parçalan覺yor gibi hissediyor. Bir çok kez meseleyi konutum onunla ve biraz daha iyi oluyordu ama bir gün sürüp yine eskisine dönüyordu. Herneyse bunlar覺 neden sana anlatt覺覺m覺 bilmiyorum.Tüm kalbimle seviyorum onu. Fakat sevmek bu kadar zorsa eer, hayat覺m覺 yaln覺z geçirmeyi tercih ederim. Kendimi ondan bakas覺yla birlikte hayal edemiyorum. Ben birini severken içten severim ve bu hissler kolayca yol olmaz. Bazen hiç bir eyi önemsemeyen souk kanl覺 biri olmak isterdim. O zaman herey daha kolay olurdu. Tamam susaca覺m imdi.

Quoting nessah

yes we have talked. and the first night on whatsapp we had a big fight.
we almost seperated. we cursed at each other.
u know, i hate that he is out at night. and he hates to be at home.
i dont know how to solve it. i just want a normal lover.
that has a job to go to at days. mature. not making me worried.
when he is outside at nights, I beg him to go home.
I feel stupid when I do that. becuz of course i dont want to
pressure him. of course he should be free. but if u love someone u must
do some sacrifices sometimes. dont u agree? if i was outside every night..
he would never accept that. or if i did something that bothers him.
when he is outside very late. i just sit at home and cry and wondering
wwhat he is doing. and i worry. i cant sleep. i wish that he would
understand.but he just get angry at me.
most of the time i just keep quiet and cry instead. it feels like something
is breaking inside of me. i tried to talk with him about it many times.
sometimes he became better. but only for some days. then its the same again.
anyway i dont know why im telling u this. i love him with all of my heart.
but if love is this much hard. then i would rather spend the rest of my life
alone. i cant see myself with someone else other than him. when i love someone,
i really love deeply and it doesnt fade away. sometimes i wish that i was a
cold person who didnt cared. everything would be easier. ok i will be quiet now.

 

 

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