to be wife of Turkish man,look likes to trying pick roses on a very thorny garden  (sure with many exceptions) may be very hurting,but worth to try it...

I have been following this forum topic for a few days but I never put my opinion here. Actually when you are tourist things here in Turkey drives to be different than when you are living and have a panoramic view of everything.

Every foreing person I have met here in this time I live here have been telling me the same story about marrying a turk citzen... in the beginning everything looks perfect and you believe you have found the real happiness but after a while the person (turk one -it doesnt matter if its female or male) just change his/her behavior and things run to crash in a wall. And the stories are one worse than the other one. Of course that we cant generalize but for myself after had been listen such things I definitively have been rulling out of being with a turk. First of all its so hard that their families accept you coz the cultures and traditions are completely different and then the guys and girls here normally do what their family say and advice them to do, so if they do not accept you, be ready to come back to your country with your heart in peaces in one hand and the luggage in the other one... and other important matter is the language.. if you dont know it well and dont understand what they say, they use this to say things about you even in front of you and generally they are just trying to find a reason to send you back withou care how much you spent to be here or how hurting it has been for you since they care just about themselves mostly, quite selfish indeed. be careful.. lots of people are suffering now coz of that, you dont need to be in such situation. quite though indeed. turks with more opened mind are living abroad and are rulling out of the reality of their own country and families... I heard it from a turk who have been living abroad for years.

 i think we all find similarity and conformity around us. That coupe´s found Turkish men who are eager to marry foreign girls. By now the last message here is from Lady_Metal. She sees girls/boys with broken hearts in marriage with Turks. One who is in such marriage and still happy will find many same examples around. We see the world through our eyes, we build the outer world in accordance with our inner one, at last we get from outer world what is already inside of us in the form of our attitude.

Great post, raindrops! I know about 10 or more normal marriages without dissasters with turks. Well already I avoid negative people because my target is to create a happy and calm surroundings about me. We choose people according to our values and people do not change! 

I know of some very successful marriages between Turkish/non Turkish people - I also know of a lot of disasters.  But I think you must be very young if you think people don´t change.

Sometimes even among people from the same country is difficulto to live together coz they gorwn up in different houses with different habits... being with a person with different culture and habits isnt that easy and after living together you can discover some things you couldnt see before then after a while you discover that the person you were sure you knew is somebody else completely different and sometimes its so disappoiting that you really cant be withe person anymore. I am not talking just about turks but everywhere is like that. Dont take it wrong please.

"But I think you must be very young if you think people don´t change." Such sentences doesnt seem very intelligent. I mean deciding about age from someone´s thoughts. You can easily be wrong. Essence of people do not change. It can only develop to something. You just have to see the seed`s characteristics.

What is essence:

- Parents, who they are and how they educated their child

- Surroundings the person lived in

- Friends

I think you can get the person´s description quite well from these things.

I am not deciding your age from your thoughts - I just found the sentence ´people don´t change´ to be a bit naive.   I´m sure everyone likes to think that´s true when they are young but I just don´t think it is. 

Sorry if I offended you

 +10000000

People change radically!!!! Hell!  I am so glad I am no longer with boyfriends I thought I was in love with, in my late teens/early twenties!!!

An english saying

You never really know a person till you have lived with them

I think we have different things in mind.