Alfie - Lily Allen

Ooooo deary me,
My little brother's in his bedroom smoking weed,
I tell him he should get up cos it's nearly half past three
He can't be bothered cos he's high on THC.
I ask him very nicely if he'd like a cup of tea,
I can't even see him cos the room is so smoky,
Don't understand how one can watch so much TV,
My baby brother Alfie how I wish that you could see.

Oooooo I only say it cos I care,
So please can you stop pulling my hair.
Now, now there's no need to swear,
Please don't despair my dear Mon frere.

Ooooo Alfie get up it's a brand new day,
I just can sit back and watch you waste your life away
You need to get a job because the bills need to get paid.
Get off your lazy arse,
Alfie please use your brain
Surely there's some walls out there that you can go and spray,
I'm feeling guilty for leading you astray,
Now how the hell do you ever expect that you'll get laid,
When all you do is stay and play on your computer games?

Oooooo I only say it cos I care,
So please can you stop pulling my hair.
Now, now there's no need to swear,
Please don't despair my dear Mon frere.

Oh little brother please refrain from doing that,
I'm trying to help you out so can you stop being a twat.
It's time that you and I sat down and had a little chat,
And look me in the eyes take off that stupid fitted cap.

Oooooo I only say it cos I care,
So please can you stop pulling my hair.
Now, now there's no need to swear,
Please don't despair my dear Mon frere.

Please don't despair
Please don't despair
Mon frere

Alfie - Dionne Warwick

What's it all about, Alfie?
Is it just for the moment we live?
What's it all about when you sort it out, Alfie?
Are we meant to take more than we give
or are we meant to be kind?
And if only fools are kind, Alfie,
then I guess it's wise to be cruel.
And if life belongs only to the strong, Alfie,
what will you lend on an old golden rule?
As sure as I believe there's a heaven above, Alfie,
I know there's something much more,
something even non-believers can believe in.
I believe in love, Alfie.
Without true love we just exist, Alfie.
Until you find the love you've missed you're nothing, Alfie.
When you walk let your heart lead the way
and you'll find love any day, Alfie, Alfie.

Becoming More Like Alfie - Valerie Lemercier

Once there was a time
when my mind lay on higher things
And once there was a time
I could find pretty words to sing
But now, well now I find
it saves time to say what you mean
I know it seems so unrefined
but it's time to let off some steam

Oh come on!
Everybody knows that No means Yes
just like glasses come free on the N.H.S.
But the more I look through them the more I see
I'm becoming more like Alfie

Once there was a time
when a kind word could be enough
And once there was a time
I could blindfold myself with love
But not now - now I'm resigned
to the kind of life I had reserved
for other guys less smart than I
Y'know - the kind who will always end up with the girls

And besides
everybody knows that No means Yes
just like glasses come free on the N.H.S.
But the more I look through them the more I see
I'm becoming more like Alfie
Oh come on!

I'm not even drunk and I couldn't type the title correctly!
That's it...I am never posting again without a good dose of alcohol in my system!

That was a great idea girleegirl... if only Alfie wasn't deaf.