2. I don´t know what your problem is, but I´ll bet it´s hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you´ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I´m really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.
6. I´ll try being nicer if you´ll try being smarter.
7. I´m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
8. I don´t work here. I´m a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can´t understand a damn word you´re saying.
10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.
11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don´t give a damn.
14. I´m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We´re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn´t mean you´re an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
20. I´m not being rude. You´re just insignificant.
21. It´s a thankless job, but I´ve got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. This isn´t an office. It´s Hell with fluorescent lighting.
26. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
31. I´m trying to imagine you with a personality.
32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
33. Can I trade this job for what´s behind door #1?
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
36. Chaos, panic, & disorder-my work here is done.
37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
38. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.
39. Oh I get it... like humor... but different
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