Stop rubbing it in GG..

 You are not amused?

I got that "joke" by SMS some weeks ago.......

And decided that it was not even worthy of posting in the Jokes and Riddles thread

you didn´t realize it was a generic ´joke´ and took it personally?

I take everything personally

Grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage
to change the things I cannot accept,
And the wisdom
to hide the bodies of those I had to kill today because they got on my nerves.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today,
as they may be connected to the feet I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me always to give 100% at work...
12% on Monday,
23% on Tuesday,
40% on Wednesday,
20% on Thursday
and 5% on Friday

And help me to remember...

When I´m having a bad day
and it seems that people are trying to wind me up,
it takes 42 muscles to frown,
28 to smile
and only 4 to extend my arm and smack someone in the mouth

 If only it was possible long distance hehe

Being back here after nearly two years great to be back i must say!

Some "kind" person at work gave me some chocolates with very hot chillis in them at Christmas.  I didn´t eat them and put them in a bowl with lots of other chocolates we received in the office.

The caretaker just passed by and I saw him take a chocolate from the bowl...... 30 seconds later he ran to the kitchen and was drinking water!   I think he must have stolen a chilli-choc!

I was out walking with my 4 year old
daughter. She picked up something
off the ground and started to put it in her
mouth. I took the item away from
her and I asked her not to do that. ´Why?´ my
daughter asked. ´Because it´s
been on the ground, you don´t know where it´s
been, it´s dirty, and probably has germs´ I replied. At this point,
my daughter looked at me with
total admiration and asked, ´Mum, how do you
know all this stuff, you are
so smart.´ I was thinking quickly. ´All mums
know this stuff. It´s on the
Mum Test. You have to know it, or they don´t
let you be a Mum.´ We walked
along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she
was evidently pondering this
new information. ´OH...I get it!´ she beamed,
´So if you don´t pass the
test you have to be the dad.´



´´Exactly´.... I
replied back, with a big smile on
my face.

I was watching "Lark Rise to Candleford" this evening and this was the last conversation between two characters, a man and a woman.

Man:  "A man´s role is to conquer the world!"

Woman:  "And what is a woman´s role?"

Man: "To love them for it."      (woman falls off her bike!)

How much difference has a century made?  

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lark_Rise_to_Candleford  

taken from theabove link:

Because Thompson wrote her account some forty years after the events she describes she was able to identify the period as a pivotal point in rural history: the time when the quiet, close-knit and peaceful rural culture, governed by the seasons, began a transformation, through agricultural mechanisation, better communications and urban expansion, into the homogenised society of today.^[1] The transformation is not explicitly described. It appears as allegory, for example in Laura’s first visit to Candleford without her parents: the journey from her tiny village to the sophisticated town representing the temporal changes that would affect her whole community.^[1] Although the works are autobiographical, Thompson distances herself from her childhood persona by telling the tale in the third person; she appears in the book as “Laura”. This device allows Thompson to comment on the action, using the voice of “Laura” as the child she was and as the adult narrator, without imposing herself into the work.^[1]