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Changing religion?
(11 Messages in 2 pages - View all)
[1] 2
1.       lama16
44 posts
 23 May 2006 Tue 02:32 am

I would like to know would you change your religion to muslim from another religion? is it possible to get married to a muslim without changing religion?

please discuss this issue. facts, personal experiences and why you change or why you didnt change...

im facing a dilemma where my gf wants me to become muslim and i dont want to. i like my life as it is. im half chinese and half british and im worried about if i change it will affect a lot of thing, since my parent are chinese thier main cuisine consist of pork, therefore if i change religion im not allow to eat pork? i would think that in this era that you would be fine marrying a muslim and a non muslim.

i love her dearly and she is my bitanem. but i perfer to stay the religion i am...

please discuss.
thanks

2.       Aenigma
0 posts
 23 May 2006 Tue 02:37 am

3.       Leann
37 posts
 23 May 2006 Tue 06:39 am

Quoting lama16:

I would like to know would you change your religion to muslim from another religion? is it possible to get married to a muslim without changing religion?

please discuss this issue. facts, personal experiences and why you change or why you didnt change...

im facing a dilemma where my gf wants me to become muslim and i dont want to. i like my life as it is. im half chinese and half british and im worried about if i change it will affect a lot of thing, since my parent are chinese thier main cuisine consist of pork, therefore if i change religion im not allow to eat pork? i would think that in this era that you would be fine marrying a muslim and a non muslim.

i love her dearly and she is my bitanem. but i perfer to stay the religion i am...

please discuss.
thanks



hi there..i not agree that change your religion is just because of marriage..do change if you really believe it..I am chinese too and come from a buddist family..but i do convert to be muslim before marriage and i do beleive in it.Your gf is muslim and u are not,once u both stay together..have to respect each other religion..and you have to give up to eat pork ( i dont think is hard)
wish u all the best

4.       mlashkar
57 posts
 24 May 2006 Wed 02:40 pm

I want just to explain to you that a muslim girl can only marry a muslim man not other.
But a muslim man can marry either muslim, chrestian or jewish woman.

5.       mltm
3690 posts
 24 May 2006 Wed 05:18 pm

I believe there are a lot of couples where the girl is muslim and the man is not. I don't know exactly its place in Kuran, I've also heard that a man marrying a nonmuslim girl is much more tolerated, and such marriages are mush more common, maybe because they consider the children to be muslim if the father is muslim and the woman is more controllable.
But in this century, there're a lot of people who live more freely as they believe, and a family should be quite traditional and religious to ask such a thing. If the family and the girl insistingly are asking you to convert to İslam instead of respecting who you're, I think you should also consider your marriage again. It could be a signal of other serious problems in the future.
So, in conclusion in Türkiye, there's not such a thing like having to be both Muslim in order to get married, your religion is not even asked by the government. It's something about families, and therefore you can understand the family is conservative about religion.

6.       Deli_kizin
6376 posts
 24 May 2006 Wed 11:47 pm

Look, it's so simple: if you change the word Religion into Belief when you ask yourself about it. "Do i want to change my belief". Doesn't that sound quite funny? A belief can change within circumstances, things will happen which will make you maybe believe different things, but it's not something you can just 'change' whenever you 'want to' from 'day to day'. It's not like: "Hmm, i don't like the color of my cellphone, let's buy a new front". A belief is something strongly within you and it cannot be just put there like a chip in a computer. It's soemthing that comes from within, not from without.

If you would change your beliefs only for your love, you're not only unfair to your own 'real religion', you're also unfair against the ones who are really muslim, which means you will not be honest against your gf, and you won't be honest against yourself either.

If she keeps insisting on converting to Muslim, i would definitely reconsider your marriage and the girl. Please don't get me wrong or feel hurt, i don't want to judge your love. But religion should never be in the way of love.
Also, i heard that in conservative turkish families, you don't just marry the girl, but you marry her family, symbolically spoken. Please don't get me wrong again I don't want to label her family either and judge peole whom i don't even know. But i think you should think really carefully about it.

Religion is a part of your life. And so is love. If these two seem 'uncombinable', you will face a lot of problems in your life, as it might start to seem you have to choose between her and your religion/God, or that you feel she is choosing between you and Allah. This is a choice that shouldn't be made, even thinking of it, shouldn't exist. There should be space in both of your lives for religion and love. And if that space of her religion makes it more practical if you stop eating pork, then do so. But don't pretend to believe in a god of which you think for yourself isn't there, or is different in your own religion.

You should not ask us. I'm gonna tell you a huge cliché now, but just look in your heart. I believe it holds most answers of human kind.

7.       Lyndie
968 posts
 25 May 2006 Thu 02:59 am

Absolutely beautifully put Deli_Kizin. Really very wise and wonderful words from you.

8.       lama16
44 posts
 25 May 2006 Thu 07:06 pm

Thanks for your comment class. what about the turkish parents? im guessing that they are quite traditional, they would want their daughter to marry another muslim. so im guessing that they wont accept me if im not a muslim?

9.       Joey
0 posts
 25 May 2006 Thu 10:15 pm

Religion can be a problem here in Scotland as well.When my wife and I were getting married many years ago she being a Catholic wanted to be married in the local chapel.I was a Protestant and the only way we could be married in the chapel was that we had to agree to raise any children as catholics.It may have changed now though.

10.       Deli_kizin
6376 posts
 25 May 2006 Thu 11:10 pm

Quoting Lyndie:

Absolutely beautifully put Deli_Kizin. Really very wise and wonderful words from you.

]

Thank you very, very much Lyndie

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