some of my thoughts on your excellent translation
Şu Boğaz harbi nedir? Var mı ki dünyâda eşi?
What is that Bosphorus war? Is there an equivalent to it in the world?
I have seen some versions of this poem with boğaz written without a capital letter.
The war was fought around the Çanakkale Boğazı, so maybe şu boğaz in the poem could be thought of as that ´strait´
What is the war of that strait?
and just a few small corrections made in red below
Ne hayâsızca tehaşşüd ki ufuklar kapalı!
What a dishonourable gathering, because of it the horizons are overcast.
Nerde-gösterdiği vahşetle ´bu: bir Avrupalı´
Where is “This is a European.” with the violence he shows?
[normally in English, we use ´an´ when the following noun starts with a vowel, but with words starting with ´u´ or ´eu´, if they are pronounced like ´yu´, as in university, European, then we use ´a´]
