Just a general question (not criticism) but how do you manage to talk on MSN if you need translations for sms and email? I've noticed this a few times on this site, and it always puzzles me! How can you get to know someone well, and love them, if you can't communicate?

This is hard and difficult, but in my case we talk German, in an easy way. But I´ve asked him to really express himself in his own words, and then there is no other option than Turkish.
But you know, we don´t need words all the time. Sometimes you just `connect` on a higher level and that is what happened in our specific case. Only when you´re not physically together, you need more words.

Aenigma x,
I can answer this one. I am still at the flashcard/vocabulary stage of learning Turkish. I recognize words and endings, but stuggle to put a sentence together. Omer's English is not good- on a scale of 1-10, maybe a 3.

We talk every night on the phone, and IM/webcam at least once a week. How? well, the same way we spent a week together, with a dictionary, and lots of mistakes. We usually get our point across albeit in the infinitive.

I have several Turkish grammar books, so I prepare a list of things I want to say in advance, and Omer is very good and patient. He understands English pretty well, but struggles with speaking. He also prepares what he wants to say about his day. It works.

No, we cannot converse in the way we both need to, but we have the will to learn. It is far from ideal, and we do much better in person. When I read what I write here, I know it sounds ludicrous. But, I'm just crazy about him, and he me. There is no sense to this one...But so far we are doing well.

Christine
I know exactly what you mean, I too am at the early stages of learning, I can pick up some words and the endings but I struggle when putting the whole sentence together.. the dictionary is great because it also gives you part or full sentences too, which is a great help..

classic example!

I wanted to reply to a text in turkish just to say yes if you think its the right think to do, fine, when i looked up the word think in the dictionary, it gave me this

yapmaya deger diye dunsunuyorsan yap -(if you think it's the right thing to do then do it) which was exactly what i wanted to say.

This one on the other hand is different :
Hayalta barisik olamlim - now i don't know what this means
but from looking up each word in the dictionary

Hayalta = imagination or fantasy or dream
barisik = people nations who are at peace with each other
olamlim = that or he/she or it, no i still don't know what this means lol....

Well, I admire you all for your determination . I would find it very hard, particulary concerning humour. It hard to make subtle jokes and laugh together when you can't speak the same language and (for me) laughter is attractive and very bonding. Without this, I think a relationship would become very dull. There is nothing quite like a good old giggle with your loved one

Anyway, good luck to you all !

The first thing I fell in love with about Omer was his sense of humour. I never laugh so long or so hard.

Honestly, I am so serious in my work life, and often stressed. When I talk to Omer, he makes me laugh- When we were together- I lost weight from laughing so much. I like that he brings out that side of me more than anything.

You must think- how is it possible to laugh-his tone, his questions, his silliness and outrageousness. I can't wait to learn to understand, because then I will come to love his wit (which presently eludes me)

It's hard to explain how we do it. But humor is an ESSENTIAL component of any relationship!

Don't get me wrong we can communicate in English no problem. His english is good and he is still learning, but were both learning together and believe me it is fun, plus you also have that sense of acomplishment when you make such an effor to learn a language so you can understand someone better..

Trying to learn Turkish has opened up a whole new life for me and given me something new to achieve,

The two of us learning together, making mistakes together laughing about it and helping each other out. If that doesn't bring two people closer together, I don't know what does ...