I don't know if anyone has thought of it before but I thought it would be a great idea to write our stories down. They could be about anything! (how your day was, why you are upset, what was your most funniest/embarassing moment, your most memorable holiday etc etc)

I thought this was a good idea because if someone is a little upset/hurt maybe we could help them in their situation and I think reading some of the stories of the funniest moments may cheer them up too

Well I have a few stories to tell .... dont think I should tell them HERE though

Well... Last night, I was going for a walk. Then, suddenly a woman, of whom I couldn't decide if she was beautiful or ugly, appeared. Because it was dark, very very dark, night. Anyway, I was going to ask her why she was out in that time of the night. But I didn't. Somehow I changed my mind, I resumed to walk.


To be continued....

Here is one for you!!

We have the key to our neighbours house and about three weeks ago they were on hoiiday. The inevitable happened, their alarm went off at 2:30 am. So I pulled on my jeans and jumper, woke husband who emerged in pants and dressing gown. We ventured down stairs sleepily and opened the front door, peering outside, not sure whether it was safe or not.

Husband went first, I suddenly heard him shout "oi, you stop, dont run away you b*****d" He quickly called to me "there is someone behind the bushes". I shouted at him to come inside whilst I called the police, I could still here him shouting at the "burgler".

Whilst I was on the phone to the police, he shouted to me again " it is the effing wheely bin"

I had to tell the police it was a false alarm and apologise profusly whilst she was laughing her head off. Then I saw the funny side and started laughing.

He had mistaken the wheely bin that had been delivered that day for a "stationary burlgar". There he was in his pants, bear footed jumping around shouting at a wheely bin at 2:30 im the morning!!

These are tears of laughter!!! It literally made me cry with laughter.
This one is definatly cheered me up. See what I mean they are of great use!
KEEP THEM COMING EVERYONE!!

Well I don't think mine is as funny as libralady's but it was hilarious at the time.

There were these Turks who were being very rude about my family for some unknow reason and because they don't speak any Turkish they thought it was funny and carried on talking about them, that is until I turnt round and started yelling at them in Turkish saying "If you wasn't so dim witted, you would realise some British people CAN speak Turkish, so why don't you get your pathetic little arses into gear and get lost!"

There were a few native Turks, who understood what they were saying but didn't want to say anything and just tried to ignore them but when they saw me in action they all had grins on their faces and some of them started to cheer, and others (including my family -who didn't realise I spoke Turkish that well) stood in disbelief (I have to admit I didn't think my turkish was that good but I guess my anger sort of helped lol.

The two boys faces soon turned from to and and eneded up leaving and as you can imagine it was my face that ended with haha!

My love Omer and I struggle with language issues, yet somehow we talk on the phone and stumble through. When we were planning my December trip to Istanbul, he asked me to bring more photos. I asked him if he wanted pictures of when I was a baby. He said "yes please! I don't know anything about this. You really have baby photos?" I said, "yes of course" he said, "how old?" I said "all ages, and that "I loved age two and three the best, but at eight and nine I looked quite funny with freckles" After some silence on his part, I asked him why he was so quiet. .. He said uhh.. noo problem...I really I love you but I am coming to learn new things about you every day. Your baby is really nine years old?"

It took some time to explain that I don't have a baby at all...

I was amazed at how graceful he was throughout the conversation.

Hopefully we'll both learn each other's languages soon

Awwww bless him, and he was so quiet about the whole thing and didn't go into a rage.

I think I am going to have to comment on every story here because I love them so much!

This is not my story it's Keith's but it is so funny i had to put it in here.

OK, The kilim story reminds me of one of favorite memories in Istanbul, an incident when I first moved here almost 5 years ago.

I wasn't shopping for them, but I was just looking through carpet shops in Sultan Ahmet, which is without a doubt, the worst place to ever by a carpet (cok pahalı.
One shop, when I told the vendor I left my credit cards at work, 2 hours away in sakarya, he offered to drive me there with the carpet. That should tell you something about the markup.
But at another place, we walked into a fairly nice store a little down the hill, right on the metro line. I'm looking at some nice carpets and was asking about a particular pattern but with more green. The guy told me to follow him. We went to the far side of the store and honestly, behind some hanging carpets, they had what I can only call a secret elevator. As soon as we got to the top level, they had tea, water and sweets waiting for us. They were all dressed in dark suits and had radio ear pieces. They looked like the secret police. Within minutes, thy had about 10 green carpets layed out for us. At this point, I'm not think carpets, I'm thinking escape. Without trying to look uncomfortable, I was literally looking for the escape route. I saw no stairs, and we are there with nearly ten of these guys, two in front of the elevator. Talk about your hard sell...
Anyway, after about fifteen minutes of looking at the carpets and plotting my thoughts in my tea, I finally thought of a plan. You are saying "Keith, you could have just asked to leave", but trust me, my instincts were completely correct and they were not going to let us out without a credit card transaction (Russian Mafia, i dont know). I told them that my hotel was down the street and I had some pictures of my house in some photos there that I wanted to match color. I told them we would go get the photos and bring them back. They said they would send someone to go get them for us, immediately wanting the hotel name so they could call and arrange with the hotel. I told them this wasn't necessary, that we could go get it ourselves. The whole time this negotiation was going on, several of the senior "managers" there were whispering to each other about the situation and talking to people downstairs on their radios. Finally, I agreed that they were free to escort us to the hotel (which of course I wasnt staying at). The two suited guys that walked with us to the hotel, came into the lobby also, not even willing to wait outside. Me and my GF at the time (turkish mind you) took the elevator up a few floors and immediately "escaped" down a set of back stairs and out the back door. I didnt ever feel in danger, but didnt want any more confrontation either. My curiosity wouldnt let me just leave either. The girl and I looped around back to the front of the hotel acrossed the street and went into the second floor of a coffee shop by the window so we could see the hotel front. Within minutes, the guys came out of the hotel and were talking on the radios. Within literally two minutes, three more guys from the carpet place "the older ones" were in front of the hotel and they were obviously discussing the situation. One of the guys that just came went into the hotel alone. I assume he went into talk to the hotel frontdesk people to inquire about us. After about 5 minutes he came out. The 5 of them argued in front of the hotel for about a minute and then headed back to their carpet place.
Again, rather than ever being scared or angry, I enjoyed the game and we laughed about it the rest of the day. It was so unreal!!!
About one week later, I was alone and found myself in Sultan Ahmet again. I couldnt help myself. I walked passed the carpet shop very slowly, slow enough to be seen. I made eye contact with several of the guys from the week before. I couldnt help it but i got a big smile on my face. To this day, I still go by the carpet place whenever I'm over there, which is only when I get hungry for SultanAhemt kofte (the original, not the fake). And still, there are several of the same guys there and when they see me coming by, they laugh too...
I honestly could write a book on all the great and hilarious experiences I have had since I've been here.

man...that's scary, but funny at the same time...

I thought it was just hilarious when he told me, I couldn't stop laughing!
I can imagine Keith running away from these top security guards around Türkiye like James Bond or someone haha!

yeh or mission impossible...in fact i can hear the theme song now as i re-read it...hehehehehe...