Turkey |
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Being not married and having a child
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| 10. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 01:27 am |
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Quoting aenigma x: Quoting MrX67: Quoting karekin04: Quoting MrX67: theres a saying about that in Turkish,''gördüğün inan,duyduğuna inanma''(believe what you saw and don't belive what you heard)  |
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Hmmm ama...I would imagine, Mr. X67, in a culture where virginity and parentage are of paramount importance, it is a disgrace to have a child if you are not married...no? |
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| 11. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 01:34 am |
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Quote: Quoting karekin04: i think just an information error karekin.. |
 but on the topic maybe you can answere a question thats kindoff on that topic. If a woman there does have a child when she is not married (with her boyfriend or whatever) do the men take responsibility? Maybe even help out financially? |
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| 12. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 02:14 am |
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Socity and laws are different things. Society may think it is a shame having a child without marriage. But laws (which are same all around Turkey) protects the innocent baby's rights and treats him/her equal. Has identity (if proven medically) with father2s name and family name. If mum does not want to say who the father is, simply gives the baby her family name, takes the ID.
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| 13. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 12:49 pm |
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Quoting MrX67: well as i said to be a kid without a dad or to be a singel mum may be one of the hardest social stitation in Turkish people still,especially at the rural areas aenigma,may be thats a wrong choice for the mum... |
You can't just blame the mum MrX67! What about the absent dad eh? Doesn't he get any blame? 
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| 14. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 01:28 pm |
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Quoting aenigma x: Quoting MrX67: well as i said to be a kid without a dad or to be a singel mum may be one of the hardest social stitation in Turkish people still,especially at the rural areas aenigma,may be thats a wrong choice for the mum... |
You can't just blame the mum MrX67! What about the absent dad eh? Doesn't he get any blame? |
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| 15. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 06:22 pm |
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but MrX... you still are saying things like "you can't blame the child for a parents mistake"???? My question is.... why is it a mistake? If these people are in love and have spent time together and happen to get pregnant its a mistake??? It's looked down on??? So it's ok then women have to have abortions to save face, because I know that happens there. What a sad society having to always hide the reality that its not the early 20th century. Again I say... love and reproducing was around long before the concept of a "legal marriage".
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| 16. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 06:33 pm |
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I am afraid I have to disagree with you, for once Karekin!!! I think there is no excuse for "accidents" these days - its just selfishness and lack of responsibility that causes them (with only a very few exceptions).
Its one thing to be in love for a while and spend time together, but quite another to bring a human being into this world. It should be planned and both parents should think very hard about it. A baby not some kind of "seal" to a relationship, it's at lifetime commitment.
Just my opinion..... 
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| 17. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 06:34 pm |
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Quoting karekin04: but MrX... you still are saying things like "you can't blame the child for a parents mistake"???? My question is.... why is it a mistake? If these people are in love and have spent time together and happen to get pregnant its a mistake??? It's looked down on??? So it's ok then women have to have abortions to save face, because I know that happens there. What a sad society having to always hide the reality that its not the early 20th century. Again I say... love and reproducing was around long before the concept of a "legal marriage". |
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| 18. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 06:41 pm |
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Quote: sure the biggest fault on dad ,and so why passed that for its clear and known by everyoneand really big shame or lack of self respect for a man,to leave her with a baby.. |
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| 19. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 06:46 pm |
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Quote: Quoting geniuda: sure the biggest fault on dad ,and so why passed that for its clear and known by everyoneand really big shame or lack of self respect for a man,to leave her with a baby.. |
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Shame on BOTH of them for NOT using contraception!
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| 20. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 06:48 pm |
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Quote: Quoting aenigma x: Quoting geniuda: sure the biggest fault on dad ,and so why passed that for its clear and known by everyoneand really big shame or lack of self respect for a man,to leave her with a baby.. |
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Shame on BOTH of them for NOT using contraception! |
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