Turkey |
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Being not married and having a child
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| 30. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 07:15 pm |
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Quoting aenigma x: Karekin!I think you are mistaking what I am saying - clearly, from what you say, your children were planned (it makes no difference if you are married or not, as long as both parents want to bring a human being into this world).
I feel very strongly about all these unplanned pregnancies as I used to work in this area and was sick of hearing about "my boyfriend didn't like using them" or "I can never remember to take pills" coming from parents who were so inept at caring for their children that they were on child-protection registers.
It makes my blood boil!!!!! 
PS I dare!  |
My story is to bizarre to even share but it really doesn't fit in any scenerio
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| 31. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 07:16 pm |
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Quote: Quoting MrX67: Quoting karekin04: and how come a kid can get enough love without dad or mum?? |
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| 32. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 07:18 pm |
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Quote: Quoting karekin04: Quoting MrX67: Quoting karekin04: and how come a kid can get enough love without dad or mum?? |
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| 33. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 07:26 pm |
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Quote: Quote: Quoting aenigma x:
Shame on BOTH of them for NOT using contraception! |
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It was not intended to be a joke. I was following on from my post above. Why would you think it's funny? Sorry, but having a baby is a lifetime commitment, not some kind of joke. If you are old enough to have sex, you are old enough to make sure you PLAN a baby and don't let 'accidents' happen. |
As a single mother (never married) I can say that my child has been the most beautiful blessing I've ever received, I will never regret. I was in love, but surely taking my own responsibility by using contraceptives, I wasn’t planning this but yes, accidents happen. But, I will never consider this an 'accident' or a mistake because even if the dad is not with us, my child has received as much love from 'mum' and family as if the father would be here. Yes, It’s sometimes difficult because the mother has to fight sometimes triple for the child’s well being and I know it is never the same as having both parents together. But as time passed by I realized that it was better this way, why force someone to stay, then get marry and keep a “miserable marriage†which in the long run will not only affect both parties but also the child? Because it was obvious that if the father ran away his love was not truthful. I mean, all situations are different, it all depends on the circumstances, but this is only one example (mine). But yes,I agree with the fact that it is very important to take responsabilites from both sides and plan it
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| 34. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 10:01 pm |
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Quoting aenigma x: I am afraid I have to disagree with you, for once Karekin!!! I think there is no excuse for "accidents" these days - its just selfishness and lack of responsibility that causes them (with only a very few exceptions).
Its one thing to be in love for a while and spend time together, but quite another to bring a human being into this world. It should be planned and both parents should think very hard about it. A baby not some kind of "seal" to a relationship, it's at lifetime commitment.
Just my opinion.....  |
fully agree!
you cant just go around and fall in love with the person you met and think HE/SHE is my love and then go have sex.
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| 35. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 10:09 pm |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting aenigma x: I am afraid I have to disagree with you, for once Karekin!!! I think there is no excuse for "accidents" these days - its just selfishness and lack of responsibility that causes them (with only a very few exceptions).
Its one thing to be in love for a while and spend time together, but quite another to bring a human being into this world. It should be planned and both parents should think very hard about it. A baby not some kind of "seal" to a relationship, it's at lifetime commitment.
Just my opinion..... |
fully agree!
you cant just go around and fall in love with the person you met and think HE/SHE is my love and then go have sex. |
Sure, you can. That's why we have the welfare system.
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| 36. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 10:10 pm |
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what engima says, would of course be ideal.
but?
parents must raise children teaching them about sexuality.
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| 37. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 10:10 pm |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting aenigma x: I am afraid I have to disagree with you, for once Karekin!!! I think there is no excuse for "accidents" these days - its just selfishness and lack of responsibility that causes them (with only a very few exceptions).
Its one thing to be in love for a while and spend time together, but quite another to bring a human being into this world. It should be planned and both parents should think very hard about it. A baby not some kind of "seal" to a relationship, it's at lifetime commitment.
Just my opinion..... |
fully agree!
you cant just go around and fall in love with the person you met and think HE/SHE is my love and then go have sex. |
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| 38. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 10:16 pm |
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I agree marriage is not the right answer for every situation. If you become pregnant, I don't believe you should automatically marry the guy. This could complicate things even more, if your just getting married for the sake of it. "Well I thought it was the right thing to do" usually means "divorce".
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| 39. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 10:27 pm |
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Quoting femme_fatal: what engima says, would of course be ideal.
but?
parents must raise children teaching them about sexuality. |
And of course all children take notice of their parents and also those parents themselves have to be role models along with the society they grown up in.
And that means, everywhere you look, TV, advertisements, newspaper, magazines, films, games (computer sort), internet, shop windows, shops themselves........................... and of course some governments (particularly ours) make it easy to be promiscuous, handouts, housing, free this, free that.
Everyone has a responsiblity for their own society and how children grow up.
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| 40. |
16 Jul 2007 Mon 11:11 pm |
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Quoting libralady: Quoting femme_fatal: what engima says, would of course be ideal.
but?
parents must raise children teaching them about sexuality. |
And of course all children take notice of their parents and also those parents themselves have to be role models along with the society they grown up in.
And that means, everywhere you look, TV, advertisements, newspaper, magazines, films, games (computer sort), internet, shop windows, shops themselves........................... and of course some governments (particularly ours) make it easy to be promiscuous, handouts, housing, free this, free that.
Everyone has a responsiblity for their own society and how children grow up. |
but parents are the most responsible ones.
there are parents in those societies who raise their children properly in so called sodom and gomorrah.
the thing is that it is parents themselves buy them agresive games or dont control children's PC, dont know what type of books or magazines they may have. maybe in general they absolutely have no contact with children? maybe they are too busy or selfish to communicate?
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