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Why do European girls love Turkish man?
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| 90. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:13 am |
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Quoting izah: Quoting caliptrix: they generally miss the protecting point.
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I think your story is a very interesting! I picked out this single line because I really recognize this, for my self and for other woman I know.
Turkish lovers are far more possesive than western lovers. Possesiveness is seen as something bad within a relation (at least in Holland). So everybody does his best to be as less possesive as possible. Jealousy is seen as something to be ashamed of.
But: me and other girls I spoke who have/had a Turkish lover in some way like this possesivness! I think it feels like protection! When we talk about this with eachother we're supprized about our own feelings, because it's in our values not to be possesive: because of the freedom, equality and independent values (wich are the most important ones, at least in Holland).
Are freedom and protection paradoxal? |
I personally think that possessiveness and jealousy are big problems in a relationship, what ever the country of origin and something I will never understand! Why have you just quoted Holland? Possessiveness and jealousy are personality traits which maybe more prevalent in some countries than others. Some people think you can't have love with out either of the two, but I believe you can't have love with them!
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| 91. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:18 am |
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Quoting AEnigma III: Teen forum crap - I can see why you created a special "chat" thread Izah - the subject is SO IMPORTANT... |
if you dont like the subject dont join it.
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| 92. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:20 am |
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Quoting Trudy: Quoting izah: That's the protactiveness I mean
Turkeys lover is a different saying of turkish boyfriend.
But your last remark interests me the most: the possesiveness. I noticed people differ on this. Thats what I explained above. In Holland society assumes it's always a bad thing. But lots of people (at least women) just don't agree. Like me. And others who have experienced the possesiveness of a turkish lover and not disliking it. I agree I have an ambivalent feeling about it, but NOT just a bad feeling. There's something good in it for me (what I miss in the west).
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Please Izah, just speak for yourself and don't use big words like 'lots of people in Holland'! You seem to have the idea women in Holland like to be possessed / controlled / have jealous lovers/partners. I am mature, I can take very good care of myselve (even though I make mistakes in love), I don't want to be 'possessed' (like FF said: you can't possess a person) and controlfreaks or over-jealous people are not welcome. So don't count ME in with your 'lots of people' statement. |
please read before you write: "I noticed people differ on this"
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| 93. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:22 am |
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Quoting izah: Quoting AEnigma III: Teen forum crap - I can see why you created a special "chat" thread Izah - the subject is SO IMPORTANT... |
if you dont like the subject dont join it. |
she wants to join  but shes too shy
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| 94. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:32 am |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting izah: Quoting AEnigma III: Teen forum crap - I can see why you created a special "chat" thread Izah - the subject is SO IMPORTANT... |
if you dont like the subject dont join it. |
she wants to join but shes too shy |
Aenigma? shy? 
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| 95. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:39 am |
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Quoting libralady:
I personally think that possessiveness and jealousy are big problems in a relationship, what ever the country of origin and something I will never understand! Why have you just quoted Holland? Possessiveness and jealousy are personality traits which maybe more prevalent in some countries than others. Some people think you can't have love with out either of the two, but I believe you can't have love with them! |
Your view is excectly the view I'm grown up with, and everybody around me as well. And most of my life I thought this was totally self-evident. In my milieu in Holland it's not done to be possessive, its even associated with bad and aggresive behaviour. When only I was in a intercultural relationship with a turkish man I realized in some way I liked his possesiveness. I say in some way. It's quite subtle (and hard to discuss by only writing). Anyway, I was quite shocked about this discovery so I discussed this with other women to uncover their experiences. I found out I wasn't the only one. But...
If no-one does recognize this lets go back to the point of the protection. I suppose thats more important for more different people.
(I spoke about this whith quite a lot of women, but only dutch women.)
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| 96. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:46 am |
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I think it comes down to this...
Not all women, but some women enjoy the über attention.
I know of no men in the world as persistent as turkish guys. A turkish guy will hit on 10 women a day. Or, he will hit on the same woman 10 times. A foreign girl, she comes to turkey, and she is not used to being looked at so much. Or she is not used to being approached so much. AND this flatters her. So evntually, whether its the 50th guy that has approached her, or its the same guy the 50th time, eventually she wears down and says yes....
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| 97. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:49 am |
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Quoting KeithL: I think it comes down to this...
Not all women, but some women enjoy the über attention.
I know of no men in the world as persistent as turkish guys. A turkish guy will hit on 10 women a day. Or, he will hit on the same woman 10 times. A foreign girl, she comes to turkey, and she is not used to being looked at so much. Or she is not used to being approached so much. AND this flatters her. So evntually, whether its the 50th guy that has approached her, or its the same guy the 50th time, eventually she wears down and says yes.... |
have you learnt anything from turkish boys? 
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| 98. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:52 am |
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I've learned that turkish women don't like the methods of turkish men....
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| 99. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 12:56 am |
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Quoting KeithL: I've learned that turkish women don't like the methods of turkish men....
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asked a different question 
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| 100. |
20 Sep 2007 Thu 01:25 am |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting AEnigma III: Mostly because they are easy for casual sex and pay us lots of compliments. |
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so let me know how many compliments does it take the foreign girls....? you silly
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