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Turkish girls!!!
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290.       femme_fatal
0 posts
 15 Nov 2007 Thu 08:01 pm

Quoting teaschip1:

Quoting AEnigma III:

Quoting SERA_2005:

lol now that really is rude! if i was femme i could be offeneded if i thought you actually ment it Aenigma.



To be honest I never saw her (I would love to!!!). I just have this picture of her as a wrinkly old kazpol, walking around in her apron and slippers all day lol
(Cant wait for her to come back )



No no no, she is actually cute. She may start taking your attention away if you go out. You need to stick to the fat and ugly friends, that will secure your attention.


shut up teas!
i was a miss hijab!
so cute maybe you
and me a beauty!

291.       teaschip
3870 posts
 15 Nov 2007 Thu 08:02 pm

Quoting AEnigma III:

Quoting teaschip1:

Actually, your description reminded of another member here. lol



BetaF?



You are good....

292.       Bathory
156 posts
 15 Nov 2007 Thu 09:48 pm

What really gets me is that so many turkish men/woman get married do all the right things, BUT they are not happy for they dont really love each other and it becomes more of an intrapment then a happy marraige. I know i friend whos uncle was inlove with a woman, but the family of the woman did not want them to get married for he was not wealthy enough. So she got married to a man that had the money, but she does not love and he got married to a woman that does also not hold his heart. He has a child with this woman and it is already 3 years later and he still cries about her and she the same. I can understand that not in all cases it is a good idea to marry a man/woman of another culture, as it is very difficult to understand a culture that u are not use to at all. What gets me is the fact that when you are both from the same culture why is it still such a problem. I mean there is so many turkish songs of where they guy has lost his love and that he will never love a woman like her again...really makes a person think is culture so important that love has to suffer???

293.       Seraph
162 posts
 15 Nov 2007 Thu 10:37 pm

Quoting Bathory:

What really gets me is that so many turkish men/woman get married do all the right things, BUT they are not happy for they dont really love each other and it becomes more of an intrapment then a happy marraige. I know i friend whos uncle was inlove with a woman, but the family of the woman did not want them to get married for he was not wealthy enough. So she got married to a man that had the money, but she does not love and he got married to a woman that does also not hold his heart. He has a child with this woman and it is already 3 years later and he still cries about her and she the same. I can understand that not in all cases it is a good idea to marry a man/woman of another culture, as it is very difficult to understand a culture that u are not use to at all. What gets me is the fact that when you are both from the same culture why is it still such a problem. I mean there is so many turkish songs of where they guy has lost his love and that he will never love a woman like her again...really makes a person think is culture so important that love has to suffer???




Sad thing is this still happened..I'm living it right now. =( Its a loooong drawn out story about how He can't tell his parents I have kids yet (according to him) because they won't allow him to marry me if he does, and Yet if we don't tell them he said he will have to separate from his family because of it...etc..it's messed up. It's new to me that there are cultures that the family's still play a HUGE role in who yo umarry even if you love them or not. My fiance said his grandmother was upset when she heard he already picked me because she was excited about choosing him a wife.
But otherwise his family loves me..they just don't know something REALLY big about me...and it's messed up...

294.       egyptian_tomb
318 posts
 15 Nov 2007 Thu 10:48 pm

Quote:

Sad thing is this still happened..I'm living it right now. =( Its a loooong drawn out story about how He can't tell his parents I have kids yet (according to him) because they won't allow him to marry me if he does, and Yet if we don't tell them he said he will have to separate from his family because of it...etc..it's messed up. It's new to me that there are cultures that the family's still play a HUGE role in who yo umarry even if you love them or not. My fiance said his grandmother was upset when she heard he already picked me because she was excited about choosing him a wife.
But otherwise his family loves me..they just don't know something REALLY big about me...and it's messed up...



Or they use that as an excuse!!!!!!!!!!!!

295.       thehandsom
7403 posts
 15 Nov 2007 Thu 11:22 pm

Quoting Seraph:


Sad thing is this still happened..I'm living it right now. =( Its a loooong drawn out story about how He can't tell his parents I have kids yet (according to him) because they won't allow him to marry me if he does, and Yet if we don't tell them he said he will have to separate from his family because of it...etc..it's messed up. It's new to me that there are cultures that the family's still play a HUGE role in who yo umarry even if you love them or not. My fiance said his grandmother was upset when she heard he already picked me because she was excited about choosing him a wife.
But otherwise his family loves me..they just don't know something REALLY big about me...and it's messed up...



Tell him that be a man..
All parents, all relatives will say that..all my relatives said that to me..and they still do..my grand mother still talks about it: 'oh could not you find a nice turkish girl from here? what are you doing with foreigners? etc etc'.
So what? in the end he wont live with his grandma..he will be living with you...
And tell him that defying old/rubish/unnecessary traditions always makes us stronger..not weaker..
ohhh I am cross now!

296.       catwoman
8933 posts
 16 Nov 2007 Fri 01:04 am

Quoting thehandsom:

Tell him that be a man..
All parents, all relatives will say that..all my relatives said that to me..and they still do..my grand mother still talks about it: 'oh could not you find a nice turkish girl from here? what are you doing with foreigners? etc etc'.
So what? in the end he wont live with his grandma..he will be living with you...
And tell him that defying old/rubish/unnecessary traditions always makes us stronger..not weaker..
ohhh I am cross now!


Is it really that horrible? If only we could clone you handsome...

297.       alameda
3499 posts
 16 Nov 2007 Fri 01:56 am

Quoting catwoman:

Quoting thehandsom:

Tell him that be a man..
All parents, all relatives will say that..all my relatives said that to me..and they still do..my grand mother still talks about it: 'oh could not you find a nice turkish girl from here? what are you doing with foreigners? etc etc'.
So what? in the end he wont live with his grandma..he will be living with you...And tell him that defying old/rubish/unnecessary traditions always makes us stronger..not weaker..
ohhh I am cross now!


Is it really that horrible? If only we could clone you handsome...



I've seen that same thing and have no idea what the answer is other than try not to get into such a situation. In our global world that is easier said than done.

I'm sure there will be some here who would be amazed to see me say sometimes Turkish parents can be unreasonable and tyrannical. Nobody should be forced or coerced into marrying anyone they do not want to marry, but it does happen.

It is a very difficult balancing act to play. If there is no rational reason for them to prevent you being together, you have to be very patient and your partner must truly be a partner.

I know one man who is with a woman his family did not approve of. He has remained an attentive son, but he loves this woman and will not leave her. He's been with her for many years and through the years the family has learned to respect her and their relationship.

The Turkish son has done an amazing job dealing with this.

One should never marry someone they don't want to marry just because your family wants you to. To be in love and marry someone else is tragic, and a disaster waiting to happen.

298.       kafesteki kus
0 posts
 16 Nov 2007 Fri 01:57 am

Quoting thehandsom:

Quoting Seraph:


Sad thing is this still happened..I'm living it right now. =( Its a loooong drawn out story about how He can't tell his parents I have kids yet (according to him) because they won't allow him to marry me if he does, and Yet if we don't tell them he said he will have to separate from his family because of it...etc..it's messed up. It's new to me that there are cultures that the family's still play a HUGE role in who yo umarry even if you love them or not. My fiance said his grandmother was upset when she heard he already picked me because she was excited about choosing him a wife.
But otherwise his family loves me..they just don't know something REALLY big about me...and it's messed up...



Tell him that be a man..
All parents, all relatives will say that..all my relatives said that to me..and they still do..my grand mother still talks about it: 'oh could not you find a nice turkish girl from here? what are you doing with foreigners? etc etc'.
So what? in the end he wont live with his grandma..he will be living with you...
And tell him that defying old/rubish/unnecessary traditions always makes us stronger..not weaker..
ohhh I am cross now!


what a rebel you are thehandsom!!!weren't you taught to respect the elderly ones????and tradition?customs...?well...joking!!!!
it reminds me of the film"Fiddler on the roof"and the old matchmaker from there....
mingling with foreigners,isn't it the thing that is wrong in the eyes of people who got stuck to the old way the world goes on?
All unknown seems to be banned and suspected.Not to mention inappropriate!!!!
Breaking habits is always considered to be a bad thing.
Anyway,u r right saying that your choices should be respected as it is your own life and your happiness!
Unfortunately,so many people want to force happiness on us in the name of our good.And where is understanding????

299.       catwoman
8933 posts
 16 Nov 2007 Fri 01:59 am

Quoting alameda:

I've seen that same thing and have no idea what the answer is other than try not to get into such a situation. In our global world that is easier said than done.

I'm sure there will be some here who would be amazed to see me say sometimes Turkish parents can be unreasonable and tyrannical. Nobody should be forced or coerced into marrying anyone they do not want to marry, but it does happen.

It is a very difficult balancing act to play. If there is no rational reason for them to prevent you being together, you have to be very patient and your partner must truly be a partner.

I know one man who is with a woman his family did not approve of. He has remained an attentive son, but he loves this woman and will not leave her. He's been with her for many years and through the years the family has learned to respect her and their relationship.

The Turkish son has done an amazing job dealing with this.

One should never marry someone they don't want to marry just because your family wants you to. To be in love and marry someone else is tragic, and a disaster waiting to happen.


Really beautifully said Alameda.

300.       kafesteki kus
0 posts
 16 Nov 2007 Fri 02:14 am

Quoting catwoman:

Quoting alameda:

I've seen that same thing and have no idea what the answer is other than try not to get into such a situation. In our global world that is easier said than done.

I'm sure there will be some here who would be amazed to see me say sometimes Turkish parents can be unreasonable and tyrannical. Nobody should be forced or coerced into marrying anyone they do not want to marry, but it does happen.

It is a very difficult balancing act to play. If there is no rational reason for them to prevent you being together, you have to be very patient and your partner must truly be a partner.

I know one man who is with a woman his family did not approve of. He has remained an attentive son, but he loves this woman and will not leave her. He's been with her for many years and through the years the family has learned to respect her and their relationship.

The Turkish son has done an amazing job dealing with this.

One should never marry someone they don't want to marry just because your family wants you to. To be in love and marry someone else is tragic, and a disaster waiting to happen.


Really beautifully said Alameda.


it is,getting married to someone out of your choice,just to satisfy your family is walking on a very muddy ground and putting yourself in a prison for a rest of your life.It happened so many times in the past and still looks like history enjoys repeating itself.Sad if people do not feel strong enough to break family bonds,really sad!

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