can somebody please tell me, how can you marry or date someone when you cant even comunicate in the same language? comunication is more important then anything else in relationships because "the other things" dont take much time and you have planty of time!

Nur,bu sorunun amacı bir serzeniş mi?Anlamadım.Birbirinin dilini anlayamayan insanlar neden evlensin ki?Çok saçma.

bu sitede yaptigim ceviriler ve duydugum hikayeler bu sekilde oldugundan gercekten merak ettim yani insanlar ne paylasir nedir amac opusup koklasmak mi onun da bittigi bi yer var ve sonrasi..... butun diger zamanlarini neyle dolduruyorlar.. gecenlerde bir karikocanin mesajlarini cevirmistim ozelden ve bunlarin cocuklari da var biri baska bi yerde digeri baska bi yerde + ne kadin adamin dilini konusabiliyo ne adam kadininkini ve diger buna benzer ornekler..
kafa yordugun icin sagol!

Sometimes the language of love has come before actual languages. That is something that has been happening for thousands of years!!
I think that is special...the treasure of translating love letters...sooooo savory!

EXACTLY!

Yes, that's my main problem. When me and my bf talks, at first, we are ok but most of the times, we ended up fighting due to misinterpretation of such words which lead to too much explanations and so and so and afterwards we both laugh in our stupidity. He is 50/50 turkish/chinese and knows very little english and im still teaching him the latter and its good that he hired an english tutor. Love languages are good but not at all times, still u have to speak in a common language for better understanding.

I totally agree with this. I have often said to my boyfriend that communication is of the utmost importance. I told him, I just want to be able to have a regular nice conversation.

He has been studying English, and has become very good, and I have been studying Turkish, not as good as his level of English, but none the less, we will not rely on someone else to help us have a conversation. It is so important, that if we haven't come this far in our understanding of each other, I would have ended it. Everyone is right, without communication, there is no relationship.

I couldn't agree more, if you can't even understand an sms or an email and these are your main form of communication I would surely hope you aren't silly enough to take it seriously (relationship wise). I read all these translations people are wanting done and they always start with askim and sevgilim, and your wife and blah blah blah.... it really makes me laugh. My fiance speaks english perfect BUT there still is times when our words cross paths and we aren't understanding things exactly, it can cause small conflicts that we always resolve, but I couldn't imagine actually having to translate most of what he is saying, and personally I wouldn't want the world to know these things anyway... can I ask what brought this up anyway? just curious

Communication, patience, kindness and understanding are actions...non verbal much of the time. How many people speak the same language fluently yet still argue, still do not communicate. My personal opinion.

+1
:-S

I agree that communication is a big part of a relationship but I also think that we should learn languages for other reasons than because our "love" speaks a different language.
Because what if you break up? are you too going to give up the language?

In my opinion no-one really knows which person they will date next or where they will end up living...this does not mean I am saying to learn every language in the world but I think it is better to learn it because we want to learn it not because we have to and think it's a chore.

For example: when people brake up with their girlfriend/boyfriend, a lot (not all) will give up learning the language because of the break up, but I ask, why not carry on what you started and prove that you can do something without actually having to do so?

Just my opinion

reply to karekin 04
i ask this because i have been translating husband's and wife's texts they even couldnt manage to understand very basic daily speaking also they had a child! i really felt sorry for this couple.. also many other people maybe arent married but serious relationships!

they way things are understood and meanings are very different in different languages. you have to have the time to understand the different meanings and ways otherwise these can lead to big arguments. even when you both can speak the same language things need to be explained as to the way they are ment

Body language in all sorts ( ) is fun - sometimes - but marrying a man I can't communicate with in spoken and written language? No way! I need to be able to talk to my partner. If he does not speak my language and/or English, he should learn, same for me: I need in that case to learn his - though I hope it will not be Zulu, Xhosa or such one...

Especially having an intercultural love requires language. There will be many things you think different about or different habits you are used to. To avoid nasty surprises or painful situations, these are things to talk about. Points of view about life and religion, maybe even politics or history. Your dreams, your hopes. Dreams and hopes are more than willing to be in each others arms, walk on the beach and go out together. There is more to love than the things we do to express our love.

But.. who are we to judge someone elses love? No one can ever know what goes on between two people, no matter if they communicate with words that are intelligble to both or if they do not. Maybe there is more to love than those sms they ask to get translated. Maybe those sms are for them what a smile of a lover is when you live side by side. Who knows?

You must communicate with your partner because of knowing him/her well so partners should speak same language to know eachother..You cant express your feelings and ideas with body language..

Yes possible but you cant express your whole feelings,maybe you can express your sexual wishes but how can you have an idea about your partner without speaking totally?

Maybe a life time maybe very early..It is the most important thing must be loyalty for a marriage..People must trust eachother..Couples must give an incredible support to their partners in every period of marriage...

love doesnt have any language,,,beautiful eyes tells everything...dont talk, just look and feel

It is better for both side to learn each others' language I think. I don't have trouble with English but my boyfriend started learning Turkish. It is a kind of MUST for me because when we get married and when we have kids the first language I will teach the kids will be Turkish, naturally. Because we will be living in the states. The kids will learn English at the end but if I don't teach Turkish how will they learn it? So sweet dad has to know Turkish to communicate with the kids up to they reach a certain age and learn English by that time.

To sum up: In marriage it is important for both side to know each others' language and I think it is a kind of devotion from oneself!

i think that is so wrong of you to say. a lot of turkish men are only after english girls money and its just wrong a lot of these girls do truley love these men and in return these men seem to feel no guilt at the pain you put them through. why are you so cold hearted?

YEAH BUT THESE GIRLS DONT SEE IT AS A HOLIDAY ROMANCE THEY TRULEY LOVE THESE MEN

and dont forget not all turkish men are as shallow!!!

love is a strong thing, and if u really love something enough u will do all for it. Yes to be able to have something together u have to speak, but i dont think yer all right about that, coz when i meet my hb he dident talked danish, but he learned and yesterday was the day for our 6 years of relationship, so u see love is stronger then words!!

thank ye. I dont really know how we did it, but what we did worked,i helped him whit his danish school home work,and some how i think that was 1 of the reson we still togehter and still going stonger. if we had meet when he could perfecktly danish, i dont think we would had been where we are today. I remember most of all that we used body launguess as a tool, and most of all love dont speak any laungess, so that was what keept us up..

sorry i've only just joined an obviously 'hot' debate so i may be repeating somebody elses point of view but...
i feel that although communication is a fundemental espect of a successful relationship, speech is not the only means of communication. if you and your partener don't speak each other's language very well then learning each other's language can become a big part of the relationship... this way you can grow together, and keep things exciting at least for a while. maybe it works for those who are serious about the relationship and want to move into a new future together. i wish nothing but success for the brave adventurers... xxx

I think it is very romantic for two people of different cultures to come together and learn each other's languages..

I can see how it would be easy to fall for the swooning while on vacation at a resort.. and in defense of those who have fallen for these men, how can you not at times when they say things to you to melt your heart.. The idea of a foreign lover for many women is very romantic.

But equally, there are many of us here who have met these men differently, perhaps online, or not at a resort while on vacation..

I wish luck to all of you in your relationships... we all only want the same thing = true love.

Here I say and hopefully for the last time: men are men and women are women!

Yeah ok ok I have to agree that alot of men in tourist places do tend to go after one thing, but not all.

Thankfully I met some nice guys in my hotel in ölüdeniz, one in particular.
His name is Can (barman) and he said he had a girlfriend (not sure if he still does) and is very happy with her, loves her very much and wouldnt dream of cheating on her
He still likes to talk with other females and he doesn't see a problem with it because he will remain faithful.

It is nice to have a friend like that I think.
Unfortunatly in the same hotel the receptionist (Ãœmit) who was trying it on with my friend (though she made it PERFECTLY clear that she WASN'T interested) and then Can also told us Ãœmit had a wife and two children!

I honestly do not know how people can cheat on their partners when their partner loves them so much and especially if they have children together.
In my opinion they do not deserve them!

I'm sorry to say it but ladies are also like this too so it's not just men....infact there was a murder in Hisaronu this year because a women cheated on two men.
full story

Sometimes, you just meet the perfect guy, and the language its different...thn come strying to deal with it...put when there its love that its building up....no words, just gestures, actions and interest..tehn comes problems of communication, put at least one of them have to learn a lot about the others language to communicate........and sometimes it ends like a fairy tale...........put culture....thats another $20 bucks. Finally love sthe only thats stands up...body langauge also helps..menawhile you willlearn the language or he will.
So, I hope so.
koscakal

Look, Elisa and Robyn - lets just keep posting here eh? After all there is little else to post on here lately OK OK then both of you come up with a nice juicy, controversial subject (NOT: "ARE ALL TURKISH MEN PLAYERS" )...

and whilst im here..does anyone know why a post on marriage was posted under language asking whether marriage relies on language isn't anything to do with learning turkish language as far as i am concerned..heigh ho

Who knows? Maybe for the same reason that a personal poem for translation was posted in Turkish Poetry the other day.

La la la la la - the same old song

i try

did u?oh dear silly me

i know..what a cheek ..or in the words of catherine tate..'what a f@@@@@g liberty!'