Turkey |
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Turkish /English relationships
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| 120. |
29 Sep 2007 Sat 03:14 pm |
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Quoting Loveprague: Hi all,
I have just read everyone's reply on this subject, I firstly think it is a very good post to write and I will try and explain my view on this subject. For me it is the oppostite I am in a realtionship with a Turkish lady for me distance will not come up as a problem, I do not want to go there! of course in reality it can be but I think people put too much pressure on themselves when mentioning distance, I would hope that the people on here who have the worry on distance would work it out especially if there is a true and genuine love and bond between two people that distance is a small problem only. I have just visited my loved one in Istanbul after nearly a year through the internet chatting and building up a relationship and the meeting was something I will never forget in my life it holds such already magical memories for me. I was a single guy have a reasonable job home and social life but had that one special person missing, I went on dating agencies looking for a perfect partner, I am very outgoing not too shy and very chatty and confident person but wanted to meet a lady in my life so much after living single life for nearly three years. I got chatting to a lady from Istanbul on a chat line and at first it was just like meeting a new friend to where I am today very happy and the happiness has come from Nesrin she made it possible to have such a feeling of happiness.
I believe in life you only have one real chance to be happy and in love, I really believe that there is a soulmate somewhere for everyone, of course you have to find her/him which is not always the easy part. I think in life it is too short if you have a chance a real chance to be happy grab it, I have never thought about the distance being a problem I am very happy to visit Turkey as much as I can to see her if it works out then move to Istanbul then why not, not have this obstacle in the way life is too short I am very much a person who will take the extra strains and worries on board and hit them down with a puff of smoke. I have never loved a woman like I do Nesrin you can feel only true love maybe once or twice for me I never have been in love, had girlfriend's but never could exactly say 'I was in love' until now of course, for all those people who have loved ones Turkish man or woman then take this chance I am! |
*applause* =)
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| 121. |
29 Sep 2007 Sat 03:26 pm |
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Quoting Mina_TR: Quoting susie k: I think that all parents worry about their children regardless of where they are from, and would prefer it if they married their 'own'. |
EXACTLY!
Think it would be any different with other families of other nationalites?
I come from Latin roots and my culture is sooooo very similar to Turkish, eventhough I was born and raised in the USA. I still follow my Latin culture and respect our family morals and values, so not all foreign women are EASY!
I know that many here that may not agree with me on this, but my mother has always taught me to treat my husband with respect and to honor him always, to treat him as if he was king in his own home and to be by his side always as the faithful and obedient wife. To this day my mother has always been like this with my father and their love grew strong over the years and they have just celebrated their 52year Anniversary!
Now I'am also following my mother in the same way she was with my father with my Turkish husband  and I'am happy for it. Even at first meeting my husband he said he had seen in me similar turkish qualities that are in turkish women  what a sweetie he is for saying this!
But going back to the original topic of this post was the ditance, for me I will never regret going to Turkey and would never have let distance become the reason for losing the most wonderful man that is my husband now
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wow u're so lucky girl... good luck with everything!
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| 122. |
15 Oct 2007 Mon 03:47 pm |
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The thing I noticed on this forum is that it seems to be vastly "English Girl - Turkish Man". Are English men marrying Turkish woman really that rare?
I met my Turkish girlfriend about 18 months ago and she is returning to Turkey as her au pair visa is about expire next month. It's going to be hard work and quite difficult not being able to see her regularly but we love each other and are determined to make it work. Hopefully we can sort out a visa so that she can return in a few months time on a more permanent basis with a view to getting married next year.
Does anyone think I'm being naive about all this, have a view, know of any pitfalls that i've not even thought about or just been through the same thing? Would love to hear some replies.
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| 123. |
16 Oct 2007 Tue 04:35 am |
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Quoting English_boy: The thing I noticed on this forum is that it seems to be vastly 'English Girl - Turkish Man'. Are English men marrying Turkish woman really that rare?
I met my Turkish girlfriend about 18 months ago and she is returning to Turkey as her au pair visa is about expire next month. It's going to be hard work and quite difficult not being able to see her regularly but we love each other and are determined to make it work. Hopefully we can sort out a visa so that she can return in a few months time on a more permanent basis with a view to getting married next year.
Does anyone think I'm being naive about all this, have a view, know of any pitfalls that i've not even thought about or just been through the same thing? Would love to hear some replies. |
My guess is that we hear more about English girl - Turkish boy stories because of the holiday romances that don't really happen between Turkish girls and English boys. I mean, when you go for a vacation to Turkey, you probably don't see as many women ready to jump to a relationship with a foreigner, as you see men. The society allows men much more. Nevertheless, I assume that there's a lot of men who just don't talk about their relationships with Turkish women.
Anyways, from what you described about your story, there's no reason to think that you're naive. Inter-cultural relationships can be a bit scary, but only you can tell how she genuinely feels about you.
One thing to think about is how open-minded her family is. Do they have anything against their daughter being with a foreign man?
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| 124. |
16 Oct 2007 Tue 04:42 am |
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Quoting Mina_TR: I know that many here that may not agree with me on this, but my mother has always taught me to treat my husband with respect and to honor him always, to treat him as if he was king in his own home and to be by his side always as the faithful and obedient wife. To this day my mother has always been like this with my father and their love grew strong over the years and they have just celebrated their 52year Anniversary!
Now I'am also following my mother in the same way she was with my father with my Turkish husband and I'am happy for it. Even at first meeting my husband he said he had seen in me similar turkish qualities that are in turkish women what a sweetie he is for saying this! |
Although I respect your choices, you were right that many here would not agree with this kind of attitude! Some, like me, would even very strongly oppose!
While you can surely have a great relationship, I'd argue how is he such a great man if he expects you to be obedient to him and treat him like a king... instead of being your partner?
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| 125. |
16 Oct 2007 Tue 07:37 am |
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Quoting catwoman: Quoting Mina_TR: I know that many here that may not agree with me on this, but my mother has always taught me to treat my husband with respect and to honor him always, to treat him as if he was king in his own home and to be by his side always as the faithful and obedient wife. To this day my mother has always been like this with my father and their love grew strong over the years and they have just celebrated their 52year Anniversary!
Now I'am also following my mother in the same way she was with my father with my Turkish husband and I'am happy for it. Even at first meeting my husband he said he had seen in me similar turkish qualities that are in turkish women what a sweetie he is for saying this! |
Although I respect your choices, you were right that many here would not agree with this kind of attitude! Some, like me, would even very strongly oppose!
While you can surely have a great relationship, I'd argue how is he such a great man if he expects you to be obedient to him and treat him like a king... instead of being your partner? |
+1000000!! 
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| 126. |
16 Oct 2007 Tue 02:03 pm |
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Quoting catwoman: Quoting English_boy: The thing I noticed on this forum is that it seems to be vastly 'English Girl - Turkish Man'. Are English men marrying Turkish woman really that rare?
I met my Turkish girlfriend about 18 months ago and she is returning to Turkey as her au pair visa is about expire next month. It's going to be hard work and quite difficult not being able to see her regularly but we love each other and are determined to make it work. Hopefully we can sort out a visa so that she can return in a few months time on a more permanent basis with a view to getting married next year.
Does anyone think I'm being naive about all this, have a view, know of any pitfalls that i've not even thought about or just been through the same thing? Would love to hear some replies. |
My guess is that we hear more about English girl - Turkish boy stories because of the holiday romances that don't really happen between Turkish girls and English boys. I mean, when you go for a vacation to Turkey, you probably don't see as many women ready to jump to a relationship with a foreigner, as you see men. The society allows men much more. Nevertheless, I assume that there's a lot of men who just don't talk about their relationships with Turkish women.
Anyways, from what you described about your story, there's no reason to think that you're naive. Inter-cultural relationships can be a bit scary, but only you can tell how she genuinely feels about you.
One thing to think about is how open-minded her family is. Do they have anything against their daughter being with a foreign man? |
Thankfully I met her mother, a couple of aunts and a cousin for a long weekend in Istanbul recently. It went exceptionally well and as far as I know, all her family would be very pleased to have me marry her.
My concerns seem to rest on not being to live together after we are married. The visa system seems a little against us being together. I had always thought that she could over here for a few months before we got married in Turkey and then she can live here. But I have read that some people have got married and not been able to live together straight after. If she had not been an au pair I'm certain we would have been living together already.
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| 127. |
16 Oct 2007 Tue 06:25 pm |
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Quoting English_boy: Thankfully I met her mother, a couple of aunts and a cousin for a long weekend in Istanbul recently. It went exceptionally well and as far as I know, all her family would be very pleased to have me marry her.
My concerns seem to rest on not being to live together after we are married. The visa system seems a little against us being together. I had always thought that she could over here for a few months before we got married in Turkey and then she can live here. But I have read that some people have got married and not been able to live together straight after. If she had not been an au pair I'm certain we would have been living together already. |
It is certainly a tough situation, but I can tell you what I would do. If I felt that this relationship is a good one, and if I was ready for marriage, I'd move to Turkey for some time, maybe for a year after getting married and then it might be easier to get a visa for her to come to England. I also wouldn't want the separation right after getting married. But maybe there are some better alternatives... I wish you luck.
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| 128. |
11 Jan 2008 Fri 11:12 pm |
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there is tooo much to read.. but do turkish men cheat a lot??!
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| 130. |
11 Jan 2008 Fri 11:38 pm |
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Are you talking about m-e-n now or dudus?
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