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Outcry after French court rules on virginity.
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| 10. |
06 Jun 2008 Fri 08:50 pm |
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It's not because France court says that not being virgin itself is a reason to divorce, but because the woman had lied on a fact about herself which is an essential precondition for the husband, and the court decided that marriage cannot continue in these conditions, and as well they gave this decision to protect that woman, because now the woman wants to end that marriage as well, and it's better forr her not to stay married with him.
Marriage is not something forced by laws, the court handles each case seperately in its conditions and decides if it can continue or not.
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| 11. |
08 Jun 2008 Sun 05:09 pm |
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Quoting Daydreamer: Believe it or not, some people still think that a woman has to bleed during her first sexual intercourse... |
Well, I know!! I actually have some modern friends in the Netherlands who do think so, and they also think the man can FEEL whether youre a virgin or not. 
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| 12. |
08 Jun 2008 Sun 05:20 pm |
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Quoting Deli_kizin: Quoting Daydreamer: Believe it or not, some people still think that a woman has to bleed during her first sexual intercourse... |
Well, I know!! I actually have some modern friends in the Netherlands who do think so, and they also think the man can FEEL whether youre a virgin or not. |
Literally or emotionally!!  (sorry couldn't resist that!  )
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| 13. |
08 Jun 2008 Sun 11:26 pm |
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Quoting Deli_kizin: Quoting Daydreamer: Believe it or not, some people still think that a woman has to bleed during her first sexual intercourse... |
Well, I know!! I actually have some modern friends in the Netherlands who do think so, and they also think the man can FEEL whether youre a virgin or not. |
Yes, I think it can be noticed, but may not in all cases.
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| 14. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 12:26 am |
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Quoting mltm: Yes, I think it can be noticed, but may not in all cases. |
I'm sure it cannot be noticed physically. Maybe emotionally because of nervousness or clumsiness, but that can happen to everyone, virgin or not.
But physically? I don't think so :no_way:
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| 15. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 05:49 pm |
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Maybe France needs to put anyone who is getting married through a poloygraph test. My question is what constitues a big lie vs a white lie. Men are usually wonderful during the beginning of the relationship at their best behavior. Then as the relationship grows things change. You may only get flowers on your birthday etc..if your lucky. Him cooking you dinner and helping out with the house diminishes. Isn't that false pretenses? Grounds for a divorce? 
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| 16. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 06:07 pm |
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Quoting teaschip: Maybe France needs to put anyone who is getting married through a poloygraph test. My question is what constitues a big lie vs a white lie. Men are usually wonderful during the beginning of the relationship at their best behavior. Then as the relationship grows things change. You may only get flowers on your birthday etc..if your lucky. Him cooking you dinner and helping out with the house diminishes. Isn't that false pretenses? Grounds for a divorce? |
Great point teas! But I think women can be different before marriage too.
In anycase, I still think this should have been thrown out of court for lack of evidence....there is no way for this man to prove his wife was or wasn't a virgin. Frances has ruled against a woman because a man "said so". Shame on you Saudi Francerabia!!
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| 17. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 08:28 pm |
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Quoting Elisabeth: Quoting teaschip: Maybe France needs to put anyone who is getting married through a poloygraph test. My question is what constitues a big lie vs a white lie. Men are usually wonderful during the beginning of the relationship at their best behavior. Then as the relationship grows things change. You may only get flowers on your birthday etc..if your lucky. Him cooking you dinner and helping out with the house diminishes. Isn't that false pretenses? Grounds for a divorce? |
Great point teas! But I think women can be different before marriage too.
In anycase, I still think this should have been thrown out of court for lack of evidence....there is no way for this man to prove his wife was or wasn't a virgin. Frances has ruled against a woman because a man "said so". Shame on you Saudi Francerabia!! |
 Your right! I hear many times from married men how sex diminishes after a few years of being married among other things. Saudi Francerabia, I love it!
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| 18. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 08:41 pm |
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So, what should have been done? Let the woman stay married with this man, force a couple stay married even though they do not want?
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| 19. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 08:48 pm |
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Quoting mltm: So, what should have been done? Let the woman stay married with this man, force a couple stay married even though they do not want? |
I just don't think this should be a valid reason for divorce. How could he prove it? Of course I also think the U.S. has very lienant laws regarding divorce.
Now if I was the judge, I would order counseling for both before a decision would be concluded.
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| 20. |
09 Jun 2008 Mon 08:49 pm |
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Quoting mltm: So, what should have been done? Let the woman stay married with this man, force a couple stay married even though they do not want? |
I don't know much of the case, but did the woman ask for a divorce too? I would if I had such a backward husband, but maybe the woman really loves that man  And yes, if the husband's reason for a divorce ONLY was her not being a virgin, it would be a statement not to allow the divorce on that grounds. This problem requires a change of mentality, not a divorce.
These obviously are all hypothetical, because I can imagine how the man would respond to the wife if the divorce request was rejected. It would not make it any happier marriage. But it is the fact that the court didnt dismiss the case with lack of evidence (unless the wife confessed her 'crime') ın favor of such an idiot mentality.
And opinions on what is virginity (combined with namus) vary also loads. Some men don't even accept a woman to be their wife if she had previous relationships in which she has kissed. Others think that damage to that part which is to be 'torn' in the first night is a lack of virginity, but some women don't even have it, others have already damaged it by riding a horse or doing gymnastics and most women who willingly have intercourse don't even bleed.
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