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Turkish Marriage
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| 1. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 06:34 pm |
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well, my teacher's actually going to get married. he's engaged now. his wife-to-be is in Turkey while he's here. we were talking awhile ago, and i saw a ring on his finger. i asked about it if he's already married or anything. blah blah blah.. but anyway, me and my friends just want to know how do they celebrate turkish muslim weddings? and do we have any slots for that wedding? in traditional christian wedding, we have this bridesmaids and flower girls. how is it in turkish? what do you call them? like.. whats the best position for us? *its a very good reason for me to go to Turkey. ha ha. and as i know, for boys you actually call it kirve i think?
thanks.
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| 2. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 06:46 pm |
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Quoting azizehannah: well, my teacher's actually going to get married. he's engaged now. his wife-to-be is in Turkey while he's here. we were talking awhile ago, and i saw a ring on his finger. i asked about it if he's already married or anything. blah blah blah.. but anyway, me and my friends just want to know how do they celebrate turkish muslim weddings? and do we have any slots for that wedding? in traditional christian wedding, we have this bridesmaids and flower girls. how is it in turkish? what do you call them? like.. whats the best position for us? *its a very good reason for me to go to Turkey. ha ha. and as i know, for boys you actually call it kirve i think?
thanks. |
So they're going to get married in Turkey then? I can't tell you about traditional village weddings (but from what i've heard they are very different to city weddings). However, as I am getting married next year in a Turkish city (i'm English) I can tell you about this. In fact, nowadays modern Turkish weddings are becoming more and more like a typical English wedding- cake, confetti etc. They have the same kind of reception party as the English would just without the church bit obviously. Nowadays, the bride and groom call a councillor to come to the wedding venue (which is usually an outdoors restaurant or garden) who reads the vows in the same way a vicar would but you do this sitting down around a table and that person is in charge of all the legalities- signing the papers etc. It's common that at the wedding venue, an area is set out with rows of chairs like a church and the bride, groom, councillor and two witnesses do the vows etc at the front of the rows of chairs. Some people choose to sign the papers previous to the wedding and on the actual wedding day just focus on having fun like a reception party. Live music is also the norm. Plus, as many Turkish families are big, it is not common for the bride and groom to provide everyone with a sit down meal. For example, at our wedding we are expecting 350 people so we will just provide cake and soft drinks which is standard. As a gift, people always give gold. During the reception, the bride and groom stand while the guests walk past and attach some gold to the bride's clothes (and she wears a white sash where the gold can be attached). Bridesmaids, flower girls etc is rare as like I say the practice of an English church style wedding is relatively new. Hope this helps
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| 3. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 06:56 pm |
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My Turkish wedding was a rather small affair. We had immediate family only and got married at the local marriage office. After that, we all walked across the street and had a nice meal at a lovely restaurant that had seaside tables. It was lovely and peaceful and not a big fancy wedding at all. My sister in law had about 500 people at her wedding and it lasted all night...there was enough food for the entire Turkish Army with music and dancing. She did not have flower girls, maids of honor ect....but there were 2 witnesses at both of our weddings. So my point is, the variation in Turkish weddings is as vast as they are here in the west. Maybe you can ask your friend what the wedding plans are and you will get a better idea.
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| 4. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 06:56 pm |
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thanks for that. it surely helped. though i wonder, cant we have a role on his wedding? i was expecting maybe bridesmaids or anything, but i dont know what they call it (i`m begging for the right term). well, who knows.. i might be marrying with a turkish man someday. we're still young to know if we're the right one though. i wish by the time of my marriage, it will be a little classic since i am a foreigner. are you serious they only give golds? here in my country, as with the weddings people actually give like house & lots, house wears, appliances or anything for the new couple. and after the church wedding, they have this reception thing. i wonder how it takes for a turk couple to get married. i get confused since i've been to muslim weddings and christian ones.
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| 5. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 06:59 pm |
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In Turkey, marriages are performed at the local marriage office...Religious ceremonies are not recognized. It takes about 15 or 20 minutes if you have a counselor that likes to talk alot. If not, you just sit, sign and BAM! You're married. Religious ceremonies in Turkey are purely symbolic.
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| 6. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 07:02 pm |
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really? haha. so i wont be bored? cause with a blink of an eye, YEY! i`m married. haha. well here, it takes soooo much words. i wish to attend my teacher's wedding.
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| 7. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 07:03 pm |
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i had watched turkish weddings in youtube before... lol... (don't ask...) but it seems like, they don't have the bride's maid thing. The modern turkish wedding... well, they only had two witnesses. a guy and a girl. probably close friends of the groom and bride. And the traditional one... well... all i saw was the ceremony part... can't remember... check it out on youtube, and type turkish weddings...
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| 8. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 07:04 pm |
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Quoting azizehannah: thanks for that. it surely helped. though i wonder, cant we have a role on his wedding? i was expecting maybe bridesmaids or anything, but i dont know what they call it (i`m begging for the right term). well, who knows.. i might be marrying with a turkish man someday. we're still young to know if we're the right one though. i wish by the time of my marriage, it will be a little classic since i am a foreigner. are you serious they only give golds? here in my country, as with the weddings people actually give like house & lots, house wears, appliances or anything for the new couple. and after the church wedding, they have this reception thing. i wonder how it takes for a turk couple to get married. i get confused since i've been to muslim weddings and christian ones. |
I am certainly planning to have bridesmaids at my wedding- my sister insists! I couldn't tell you what 'bridesmaid' means in Turkish though- maybe there is no translation?? They only give gold, yes. Sometimes a coin (if you don't have much money) and gold jewellery sets if you are close family. I personally think it's a really good idea- you're not expected to keep it and wear gold everyday for the rest of your life  but gold always increases in value and you can sell it and get the cash  . How long does it take? The time between engagement and marriage is short- normally only a few months. People think i'm crazy for planning a wedding a year in advance including my fiance!! As for the reception I was telling you about- it's normally an evening do from about 8pm to midnight.
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| 9. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 07:06 pm |
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really. then maybe my turk husband have to make some changes. we'll be having the traditional one. haha. 
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| 10. |
23 Jun 2008 Mon 07:15 pm |
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Quoting hobnob: I am certainly planning to have bridesmaids at my wedding- my sister insists! I couldn't tell you what 'bridesmaid' means in Turkish though- maybe there is no translation?? They only give gold, yes. Sometimes a coin (if you don't have much money) and gold jewellery sets if you are close family. I personally think it's a really good idea- you're not expected to keep it and wear gold everyday for the rest of your life but gold always increases in value and you can sell it and get the cash . How long does it take? The time between engagement and marriage is short- normally only a few months. People think i'm crazy for planning a wedding a year in advance including my fiance!! As for the reception I was telling you about- it's normally an evening do from about 8pm to midnight. |
i think i will die thinking about it as early as now. and it hurts that my teacher is going to marry. hahaha. btw, as for some turk people i know, before they get married -- they dont really go into this relationship kind of things, boyfriend and girlfriend thing. i wonder how they manage to let their marriage survive if parents pick for them.  i remember my cousin getting married, her ceremony started 11 am. and around 2 pm i think? they went to the reception and ended around 12 midnight already.
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