I guess you have to divide it into two different groups:

(i) those foreigners who come to Turkey to get a child, and then take it away to their new country

(ii) those foreigners who live here long term, and who end up getting close to and looking after a child, but have never been allowed to formally adopt.

Most of your negative comments are about case (i).

I have three friends who fall under case (ii). Let me tell you the story of one of them.

One of their neighbours had a young toddler. She wasn´t coping very well. So they used to look after the child and babysit, and take the child out with there own children. Then one day the neighbour had to go into hospital. She asked them to look after her child while she was ill, as her husband was at work all the time. They did this. When she came out of hospital, she and her husband wanted to move to another city, but not take the child with them. She said "you help my child, would you be willing to look after her?" My friends were scared this could become a legal nightmare so they agreed, but only if social services were involved and said it was OK. Social services said you can only foster, foreigners cant adopt, even if the parents are willing.

So they have looked after C for nine years now. Every time mum visits it is clear she has a drink problem, and she cannot make a good relationship with C because she does erratic things that scare her. My friends love C and treat her like their own children. She is happy in the family. But they all know that anytime her mother can come and take her back, and that is very unsettling.

Not all adoption cases are like Madonna!

I see no problem with outside adoption IF there are not enough nationals willing and able to adopt. Why let a child rot in an orphanage just to ensure they stay in their homeland?

I have a friend (a single woman) who adopted a Chinese girl.  This child was in horrible condition when she was adopted.  She was sickly, she could not stand to be touched or held because in the orphanage she was left in her crib day after day….only picked up to be fed or changed.

Three years later, the girl is absolutely thriving!  Her mother has ensured that she is aware of her Chinese culture and kept her Chinese name.  I can’t help but wonder what her fate would have been if someone from the outside hadn’t come to give her the love and nurturing that she was lacking in the orphanage. 

As for the anti - single parent/anti-gay adoption folks out there …..how many horrible parents have we all seen that fit the bill of two parents, opposite sex?  PLENTY!  A loving home is a loving home….straight, gay, or single! 

 Why not add a bit of drama, I am not anti, just don´t agree with it 100% .

I don´t agree that everyone who wants to adopt should be able to.  Perhaps the answer is to come up with some international standards?  Really, I don´t know.  But I do know that if you are willing to take a child out of a less than ideal environment and provide love, security and a wonderful home....its  a good thing! 

As for Madonna and other celebrities.....I often wonder why they are not willing to adopt children from their own countries as well.  Since money is no object for most of them, I think it must be easier for them legally. 

 Hmmm I see your point about GG´s plans Elisabeth...

I fail to see the drama but it seems you want to make some.  What´s so dramatic about calling it like I see it.  Did I single you out? 

But if you want to shed light on your own comments, you did say that you are old fashioned and you believe that a child needs two parents, not a single or gay parent.   That would point to signs that you are against adoption by these groups...hence "anti".

Great post GG!   And isn´t the well being of a child not much more important than the sexual orientation or marital status of the parent(s) to be? As if a single parent automatically doesn´t have friends who are married, as if growing up in a family where two parents are gay a child never will meet people of the opposite sex! Come on, better (a) loving gay parent(s) or a single parent then an orphanage or a straight couple fighting like dogs, abusing or neglecting a child.

Totally agree! It´s probably best to try to keep the child in their own country so that they grow up with their cultures, etc....that isn´t always possible to pass on to a child if they are taken out of their native country. But....what if there is no one in their own country who is willing to adopt them. Definitely better to grow up in a Loving Home with Loving Parents/Parent...than in an orphanage feeling very unwanted and unloved!!

 The word "anti" is a bit dramatic ............. it is just not my way of doing things but I don´t have a problem with those who do. 

In my opinion the rights of the child is not the primary consideration in many of these cases (single adoptions, gay adoptions etc etc) but the selfishness of the person (s)  doing the adoption.

Sure. And when you got your child(ren) it was not selfish? You thought ´Hey, how can I help the world with this baby?´ - Nonsense!