Seninle tanistigim gunden beri umrumda olmadigin tek bi gun bile olmadi benim icin, hayatimdaki yerin hicbi zaman baskasiyla esit olmadi. Benim hakkimda ne dusundugunu bilmiyorum, ama ben sana nasil hissettigimi soyluyorum.
Biz birbirimizi cok uzun zaman cok uzduk didim.
I said that we had upsetted each other for a long time.
Bitek sen yaptin da demedim ben hic bi zaman, benim de ne kadar hatali oldugumu ve seni uzdugumu biliyorum.
I have never said it was only your fault. I know that I had many mistakes and I know how much I upsetted you.
Ve ben seninle 4 yilimi gecirdim, sen senden cok sey ogrendim diyosun ama ben de senden cok sey ogrendim, ve hic tatmadigim bi mutlulugu yasadim.
I spent 4 years with you. You say that you have learnt a lot of things from me but I also have learnt a lot of things from you. And I exprienced a happiness that I had never exprienced before.
Ama ayni zamanda son zamanlarda hissettigim kadar da degersiz hissettirilmemistim hic bi zaman.
But meanwhile I have never been felt this much worthless recently.
Ben bunun intikamini almiyorum, sana her zaman soyluyorum, benim aklimda seninle ilgili tek bi kotu bi dusunce bile olmadi olmaz da, cunku sen benim icin cok degerlisin ve ben sadece senin mutlu olmani isterim.
I am not taking revenge. I always say you that I have never had any bad thought in my mind about you and I will not have. Because you are very valuable for me and I only want you to be happy.
Bugun tartismasaydik sana hediyelerinin beni ne kadar mutlu ettigini soyliycektim, butun herseyi bu kadar dusunerek yapisini hic hak etmedigimi soyliycektim.
If we hadnt argued today, I was going to say how much your presents had made me happy and that I was not worthy of your thoughtfulness.
Ama biz her gunu yine birbirimize laf ederek gecirdik idilcim, biz hic boyle olmamistik.
But we spent every day with arguing my dear İdil, we have never been like this.
Ben hayatimin sensiz daha guzel olduguna karar falan vermedim, hic bi zaman da oyle olmadi. Benimle hep nefrettigin biseymis konusuyosun, umarim bu gunun birinde degisir. Iyi geceler tatli ruyalar.
I didnt decide that my life is more beautiful without you. And it never was. You always talk to me like I am something that you hate. I hope this will change one day. Good nights, good dreams.