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I found this on Face Book. I think it is in reference to American Turks....but....
You know your a Turk if....
There is sale on any item, you buy 100 of them
You make coffee in a saucepan
You think that the Turks are the most amazing race on the face of earth and everyone is jealous of us and try to destroy us
You eat Kofte and pilav for 8 days straight because your mum made enough to feed 20 families
Your grandmother can make yogurt or jam from nothing
Your guy relatives look like mafia during bayram
You call an older person you have never met before "uncle", "aunty" or abi
You hide everything from your parents
Your mum uses tea towels to cover food rather than glad-wrap
Your mother does everything for you if you are male
Your father or grandfather used to work for Ford
You claim to be European even though your family is from the Asian side of the Bosphorus
You live or have relatives in Mildura or Shepparton
You live or have relatives in Dandenong, Coburg, Auburn, or Broadmedows/Meadow Heights
You do all the housework and cooking if you´re female
You put a sound system in every car you own
Your relatives alone could populate a small city
Everyone is a family friend or somehow related to you
You always try moving out of home but always end up returning
You love kebabs, iskender and eating
You think Turks invented Kickboxing and Football
You can speak fluent Turklish.. eg "I was dertlesing on the phone..´ or ´that was lesh lan´
Instead of cooking a meal for 4 you cook for 10
When you have a dinner party there is enough food to last for the next two months
You avoid public places with a member of the opposite sex especially if there is an acquantance within 250 miles radius
You always say "open the light" instead of "turn the light on"
You get very upset when airlines refuses to accept your luggage which is 80 kg overweight
You´re walking out of customs with your trolley at the airport and you see all 25 members of your family who have come to pick you up
You ask your dad a simple question and he tells you story of how he had to walk miles to get to school
You are always taking off and putting on your shoes wherever you go
Your mother seems to think her future lies at the bottom of a little coffee cup
Your parents compare you to all of their friends kids
No one ever seems to call ahead of time to say they are coming for a visit
You talk with your guests at the door for 20-30 minutes when they are leaving
You show your love and affection to people by physically hurting them (esp. pinching, slapping, biting)
if you eat olives, cheese and tomatoes for breakfast
Grape leaves make a great dinner
You can sing at least one Sezen Aksu song, in tune, from beginning to end, backwards and sideway, and inside and out.
You go to football games armed with a range of weaponry ranging from kitchen knives to katanas.
You treat any form of international sports event as a matter of life or death.
You drink your tea from an hourglass-shaped glass… Without milk.
You know you´re Turk when your parents pronounce Coburg as Kobruk, Coles as Kolles, Kmart as Kemarket, Broadmeadows as Brotmodoz, Greenvale Reservoir as Fordun Arkasi, Coburg Lake as Corum Parki, Safeway as Sefvay...
You consider Eurovision as some form of patriotic excursion. And you´re proud that you no longer end up with ´no point´.
You end a boozy night out having a soup made of cow intestines.
And no night out is a night out without booze. Preferably raki.
And no night out starts before 11 o´clock.
You never buy bin bags but use your saved grocery bags for it.
Sunflower seeds are the snack of choice for a night in watching TV.
You´ve been on the minibus – a form of public transport consisting of a psychotic driver whose got delusions of being on a Formula 1 track, his assistant that hangs out the side door, shouting out the destination (´Aksaray, Aksaray!) and a dozen passengers huddled together like sardines in a tin.
You know at least one person who thinks yoghurt is the magical cure for every disease.
And another person who thinks going around barefoot is the cause of all major ailments.
You pull your earlobe, make a kissing sound with your lips and touch wood to ward off evil.
Any ill that might come your way is a sign of the much-feared ´evil eye´.
You´ve spent a good deal of your life taking off your shoes as you walk into a house.
And you´ve been to houses where they keep slippers of all shapes, sizes and colours for guests.
You´ve been chased around the house, at least once, by your mom brandishing that fatal weapon: her slipper.
Your family would probably disown you if you became a vegetarian. No meat? What nonsense?
You put salt in your food before you taste it
You can drink everyday of the week but you dont eat pork because its a sin
You yell at somebody who doesn´t understand you rather than re-phrasing
You require a visa to travel to half the world´s countries.
You get offended by food labels in other countries labelling your own food ´Greek feta´, ´Greek yoghurt´ or ´Greek humus´…
You dislike the Greeks because they are competition but you like them because they´re ´our neighbour´.
You are inclined to dance to any tune, including the banging and clunking of kitchen crockery.
People pretty much take it for granted that you can belly-dance simply because you´re Turkish and ´it´s your traditional dance, right?´
When you don your latest Nike trainers or your Gucci bag, it is highly likely that someone will ask you whether they are real or fake.
You probably know the hairiest man in the world, or better yet, are related to him.
´Spawn of donkey´ or ´bear´ are words that are considered to be pretty offensive insults in your native language.
You wouldn´t be able to talk if your hands were amputated.
You greet friends with a kiss on each cheek and a hug. Even if you are both male, yes.
You greet your elders by kissing their hand
Not only do you have water surrounding your corner of the world on three sides, you tend to enjoy sitting at the water´s edge contemplating your life when you´re depressed.
You spend half your lifetime complaining about your country and your people, and the other half announcing to the world you are Turkish and proud of it.
You read this list and go, "Yeah, I do that!"
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never thought I would say this to you. loved your post.
