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170.       alameda
3499 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 08:51 pm

Quoting lady in red:

..........
This doesn't excuse his comments to Daydreamer. You are strangely defensive of Adonis, almeda - I thought he seemed quite agressive right from his early posts.



He started becoming agressive in defense of his friend, when a group of ladies started attacking elibrody.

There have been others here who were very agressive, but were not attacked and then deleted, that is the point.

Instead of trying to work with him, a group decided to provoke and prod him. There was no effort to work with him in a atmosphere of hospitality and reconciliation.

I communicated with him via PM and he was not at all rude, in fact he was very polite.

171.       MrX67
2540 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 10:21 pm

noone of problem never will be fixed on world unless easterns don't feel responsible problems of west aswell westerns don't feel responsible problems of east,and unless they don't meet on a middle place between east&west???why we don't accept we all the members of same family and we all responsible about all problems as much as each other,so why always you or us??doesn't better to say weeeee??i think noone of us don't have enough courage for say ''king is naked'',while we trying to find mistakes of others clothes,really sad

172.       elham
579 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 11:20 pm

ohhh, there's more unpleasant surprise in TC these days
list of request the deletion of the membership of some friends on rise
if there was a ban on the discussion of certain topics, why not be insulting religions, one of them to avoid collisions with each other :-S

173.       alameda
3499 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 11:25 pm

Quoting MrX67:

noone of problem never will be fixed on world unless easterns don't feel responsible problems of west aswell westerns don't feel responsible problems of east,and unless they don't meet on a middle place between east&west???why we don't accept we all the members of same family and we all responsible about all problems as much as each other,so why always you or us??doesn't better to say weeeee??i think noone of us don't have enough courage for say ''king is naked'',while we trying to find mistakes of others clothes,really sad



I always love reading your posts MrX67, as I see it the problem is one of different styles of communication when we are communicating accross cultures. What would be acceptable and normal in one culture is not acceptable in another.

174.       catwoman
8933 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 11:26 pm

Quoting alameda:

Instead of trying to work with him, a group decided to provoke and prod him. There was no effort to work with him in a atmosphere of hospitality and reconciliation.

I communicated with him via PM and he was not at all rude, in fact he was very polite.


Why is it our responsibility to work with him?
Why don't you pm him and tell him to work with us?
If he felt provoked, he should have said it in a civilized way, that would be met with a civilized reply, or at least then we could be blamed, not him. An adult person should be able to control her/his feelings and not lash out in a rude, aggressive, offensive way whenever someone disagrees with him.
I find your defense of him to be very strange... at least you could give better reasons why he deserved a "better welcome", "being provoked" is like dealing with a child.

175.       NiseeD
6 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 11:35 pm

its not suprising that most of those who defend him are men....I found him very disrespectful to many women on tc

176.       catwoman
8933 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 11:50 pm

Quoting NiseeD:

its not suprising that most of those who defend him are men....I found him very disrespectful to many women on tc


true, although alameda is a woman

177.       NiseeD
6 posts
 17 Mar 2008 Mon 11:59 pm

ok I have not been on tc long and I have not personally been in any confrontation but I have read previous posts
I by no means think he is inarticulate or unintelligent when conversing with those who hold similar values
however when in discussion with self assured free thinking articulate women he was out of his depth and had to resort to insults
im not sure how old the gentleman is but perhaps a sign of intimidation and insecurity when presented with a valued argument from a women who can think for herself

178.       karpusqueen
0 posts
 18 Mar 2008 Tue 12:10 am

I don't want to get into a debate about Adonis as I already know how people feel. However, I felt I needed to give my support to him. I would also like to say that this does not mean I don't understand how other people feel.

I read the comments about how insulting Adonis has been etc. etc. but I feel what Alameda has said has some validity.

I took the trouble to read through Adonis' posts and from these, found him to,be helpful with translations, intelligent and rarely aggressive. For the most part he appears to have contributed to debates without any problems.

It seems the problems began in the manner that Almeda has described. I would even go so far as to say quite a few of his past posts about his country and Islam were almost in line with the views of the people that argued with him. An analogy of how I think Adonis has felt is this: often a brother will fight with his own brother but let anyone else criticise or fight with his brother and he will stand with him and defend him.

Reading a member's post archive has been quite an eye opener for me. I have purposely read some people's archives whom I thought to be quite aggressive or provocative. The interesting thing about this exercise is it allows one to form a more realistic picture of a member, to see the positives, not only the negatives. This has helped me and I recommend everyone to do this, if they don't already do so. It can make such a difference to the way one views a person. It is so easy for us to get caught up in the heat of a debate and be left with lasting negative feelings and not a fully accurate judgement of someone.

I have had several conversations with Adonis and we have differing views on several issues. However, he has always been polite and prepared to try and understand a different view, or agree to differ.

I have to speak as I find, and I understand everyone else has to, but Adonis has justifiable grievances too that go back further than the more recent confrontations. He has a lot to learn about how to handle taunts and opposing view points and from what I saw in his posting archive, I would say he had a lot to give too.

I hope Adonis returns as Adonis , 1, 2 or whatever, because this site appears to be changing for the better and it would be so nice for us all to try and make an effort together. We don't have to be bosom buddies but It would be a real sense of achievement if we all could use our skills to avoid flash points or creating them.

I took a long time writing this and there have been several posts since I saw Alameda's. I will repeat that I do understand everyone's point of view. My support of Adonis does not mean I oppose everyone else it simply means I have seen another side to him and I would really like to see him return for the reasons I stated in the previous paragraph.

These are only my thoughts and I don't need to add anything further.

179.       alameda
3499 posts
 18 Mar 2008 Tue 12:15 am

Quoting catwoman:

Quoting NiseeD:

its not suprising that most of those who defend him are men....I found him very disrespectful to many women on tc


true, although alameda is a woman



Seeing as I have NOT posted my gender publicly, it's quite out of line for you to do so. If I want to post my gender I will, otherwise you are taking something from me (my privacy) against my will.

180.       geniuda
1070 posts
 18 Mar 2008 Tue 12:17 am

Quoting alameda:


He started becoming agressive in defense of his friend, when a group of ladies started attacking elibrody.

There have been others here who were very agressive, but were not attacked and then deleted, that is the point.

Instead of trying to work with him, a group decided to provoke and prod him. There was no effort to work with him in a atmosphere of hospitality and reconciliation.

I communicated with him via PM and he was not at all rude, in fact he was very polite.


(I think this is the right thread )

Sorry Alameda, but dont you think he also failed to follow the rules?


Edited: and what I mean by rules is, TC rules and those "Netiquette" rules you mentioned in another thread

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