Maybe the poster is proud of it??? 

A shout out to my fellow amerikans (the super bed ones...you know who you are)

Dear Red States...

We´ve decided we´re leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we´re taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren´t aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. You get Sara Palin and Ralph Reed.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get the world´s largest ball of twine. We get Intel, Apple and Microsoft. You get WalMart. We get Harvard. You get Liberty University. We get 85 percent of America´s venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama . We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition´s, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms.

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we´re going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they´re apparently willing to send to their deaths and they don´t care if you don´t show pictures of their children´s caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we´re not willing to spend any more of our resources on it.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80% of the country´s fresh water, more than 90% of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of the nation´s fresh fruit, 95% of America´s quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners), 90% of all cheese, 90% of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy League and Seven Sister schools, plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Berkeley, UCLA, Cal Tech and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88% of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92% of all US mosquitoes, nearly 100% of the tornadoes, 90% of the hurricanes, 99% of all Southern Baptists, and 100% percent of all televangelists, plus Rush Limbaugh.

We get Hollywood, Broadway, Big Sur, The Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38% of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we´re discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a theory, 53% that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and still 61 % believe you are people with the higher morals – which must mean you don’t get “the new math”.

By the way, we´re taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico .

Peace out, Blue States

If I´m bed or not I leave to you to decide but I sure am not American, so help me out please cause I don´t know: what´s the color of the TC-Americans? Elisabeth, Teaschip, Alameda, yourself and others? (I need to know in case sympathy is asked.....   )

 Red states are those that lean to the political dark side....states that tend to vote Republican in National elections (teas, lisa). 

Blue states are for those who are enlightened ......with Democratic tendencies (me!!!). 

 Thanks.

The video of the little Yaman: Ýdare edemem anne!!!! I cannot manage mom!!!

mom: Hayýr Yaman, aç yatacaksýn. O þekerle artýk idare edersin bu gece.

          No, Yaman, you will sleep hungry. Tonight you´ll manage with this candy.

Yaman: Hayýr, idare edemem, anne, idare edemem!!! Ühühühühü

            No, I cannot manage, mom, I cannot!!!

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHJMP-G8r38&feature=rec-fresh

This video is made for all those who cannot manage anymore (with the salaries, with the promises and all...)

 The poster doesn´t understand it

 Maybe you can draw her a picture, LIR, helping to understand.....

 Nah....I´ll send her a pm

RULES FOR MEN

1. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2. It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:

(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.

(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.

(c) After wrecking your boss´s car.

(d) When she is using her teeth.

3. Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his friends.

4. If you´ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

5. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate´s fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

6. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your mate´s birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy´s choice.

7. In the mini-bus, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

8. When stumbling upon other blokes watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who´s playing.

9. You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment (commonly known as a Dutch oven), she´s officially your girlfriend.

10. It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you´re sunning on a tropical beach ... and it´s delivered by a topless model and only when it´s free.

11. Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

12. Unless you´re in prison, never fight naked.

13. Friends don´t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

14. If a man´s fly is open, that´s his problem, you didn´t see anything.

15. Women who claim they ´love to watch sports´ must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

16. A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sobre enough to fight.

17. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that´s just greedy.

18. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

19. The morning after you and a girl who was formerly ´just a friend´ have carnal, drunken sex. The fact that you´re feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

20. It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

21. Thou shall not buy a car in the colours of brown, pink, lime green, yellow, orange or sky blue.

22. The girl who replies to the question ´What do you want for Christmas?´ with ´If you loved me, you´d know what I want!´ gets an Xbox 360 or a Playstation 3 - End of story.

23. There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men´s Gymnastics. Ever.

24. We´ve all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:

´GUTS´ is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, ´are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?´

´BALLS´ is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife square on the arse and having the balls to say, ´You´re next fatty!´

I hope this clears up any confusion

Shouldn´t that be EX-girlfriend???? 

That´s me!!