Quoting Elisabeth:

Since you asked - Why would you allow someone to treat you that way? I would also like to suggest a more reliable form of birth control. You need to respect yourself and life a little more and forget about that man. He apparently likes to use you for sex and doesn't care about the consequences of his actions and you are perfectly willing to allow it to happen.

Thats just my opinion..since you asked. I wish you luck. Everyone deserves to be loved and respected but you have to feel that way for yourself first.

Quoting Bathory:

I fell pregnant when i was only seeing him for 6 months i had to get rid of the baby as he wanted me to do that, so i did. Then this year i fell pregnant again, i did not even know i was. I really wanted the baby even if i lost him. He did also not want me to have the baby and i had a abortion, which has left me broken for life.

Quoting AEnigma III:

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YOU have my deepest sympathy Leelu. I just cant feel it for these stupid people...

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What exactly is RIGHT about two abortions in one year? How can that be "correct" for anyone...?

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Quoting Leelu:

In MY OPINION and please note I have in bold "My Opinion" abortion is NOT a method of birth control .. but in all actuality a form of murder. I am not judging the person who started this thread but merely voicing an opinion. and I am actually saddened that in this day and age .. abortion is actually considered by many to be a form of birth control. There are millions of people out there that want children and cannot have them for what ever reasons that would have opened their hearts and their homes for one child that someone was "unselfish" and gave up for adoption.

Quoting girleegirl:

Quoting Trudy:

Very harsh maybe but in my opinion abortion is not murder if the mother is in danger, deep trouble or when there is proof there will not be life of any quality for the unborn child (severe handicaps e.g.). But if you use abortion as just another way of birth control, well yes than it's murder for me too. A woman who does that is - again in my view! - very immature and irresponsible. I think Aenigma is right: such a woman should consider celebacy.

Quoting Elisabeth:

Maybe my opinion is harsh but in my heart I can't condone it under any circumstances. Maybe I am not politically correct but that is my feeling. I absolutely agree with AEnigma, for some people, celebacy is the best option.

Quoting Trudy:

Quoting Elisabeth:

Yes, Trudy, I mean ANY circumstance.

Quoting teaschip1:

Abortion, is definately a sensitive subject among people. I guess I'm having a hard time with the initial post. My question would be "Why in the world would you ever let a man tell you whether or not you can have the baby?" No offense to the fathers out there, but it is the womans right to have a baby. You really have no say in the matter. And to say that your boyfriend "made you" is even worse. What does this say about you? Does your boyfriend have that much power over you?

Quoting alameda:

Alevi's are Muslim....

http://www.angelfire.com/az/rescon/ALEVI.html

Quoting caliptrix:

Quoting Bathory:

He went home in July i few days after i got rid of the baby. I called him so much i missed him so much, but some how he seemed different. He came back after a month, he was not even back in Austria for 24 hours and i was just discussing what i felt for him. When he just dropped the bom on me and told me that we do not fit and we are playing with fire. Then he said he wants to still be with me, but one day he has to take a turkish woman as his wife. For so many months before that he told me it does not matter and if things work out he wants to marry me. I even spoke to his mother and his mother told me she loves me and calles me cane.

Quoting portokal:

Quoting caliptrix:

Quoting Bathory:

He went home in July i few days after i got rid of the baby. I called him so much i missed him so much, but some how he seemed different. He came back after a month, he was not even back in Austria for 24 hours and i was just discussing what i felt for him. When he just dropped the bom on me and told me that we do not fit and we are playing with fire. Then he said he wants to still be with me, but one day he has to take a turkish woman as his wife. For so many months before that he told me it does not matter and if things work out he wants to marry me. I even spoke to his mother and his mother told me she loves me and calles me cane.

Quoting Bathory:

Please someone tell me. Honestly i need to know what is going on. I dont want to get hurt more.

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Quoting catwoman:

Quoting ciko:

just curious... is abortion banned in Christianity and Jewishness as it is in Islam?

Quoting Elisabeth:

Quoting ciko:

Quoting ciko:

But but.. if i were God i would forgive them if they had valid reasons to do it

Quoting portokal:

Quoting Elisabeth:

Quoting portokal: Quoting ciko: But but.. if i were God i would forgive them if they had valid reasons to do it If i were the church, i would say that you have just commited blasphemy!

Quoting Elisabeth:

Quoting ciko: Quoting Elisabeth: Quoting ciko: just curious... is abortion banned in Christianity and Jewishness as it is in Islam? Abortion is banned by Catholics. I can't speak about other Christian sects or the Jewish religion, but it is not accepted at all, in any form by Catholics. But but.. if i were God i would forgive them if they had valid reasons to do it

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But as Elisabeth said if you confess and feel really sorry for your sins, you are given an excuse even in a case of abortion.

Quoting ciko:

just curious... is abortion banned in Christianity and Jewishness as it is in Islam?

Quoting femme_fatal:

Quoting Elisabeth:

Quoting portokal: Quoting ciko: But but.. if i were God i would forgive them if they had valid reasons to do it If i were the church, i would say that you have just commited blasphemy!

Quoting femme_fatal:

say what you say, murdering unborn children is definetly wrong! im not the righteous one to say so, but its my opinion.
theres morality in the society: dont kill, dont steal, dont lie, dont cheat on your wife/husband etc etc.

the moral is dont be a bitch!

Quoting Elisabeth:

Whenever you talk about something like this, people are going to use strong language. I think it is far better and healthier to say what is on your mind instead of trying not to offend people. How are you supposed to say you feel abortion is murder in a way that doesn't sound harsh?

Quoting Elisabeth:

I do understand your point, To some degree you are right. When does a mass of "cells" become a "life"...but if you will for just one moment, think of it in other terms...when is a baby able to survive outside the womb? I have a 10 year old, he can't survive realistically without me. Do you think it is too late to change my mind..I have rights you know and he is really getting to be a bit of a pain.

Yes human life does start from a mass of cells but even from the very first cell division, there is a purpose and a genetic destiny for that "mass of cells". What would be a resonable time to say...ok, it is a human life therefore you can't have an abortion? I have ultrasound film of my son when I was 12 weeks pregnant. He already had arms, legs, hands, feet, there is brain activity and developement so there must be thought, maybe feelings however primal, a heartbeat. I think the ability to "survive outside of the womb" is probably not the best indicator or argument as to when an abortion should be deemed as inappropriate.

Of course, women should have rights to choose, but choose what? There is so much birth control available, so much education, so many people wanting to adopt, so many advances in medical science to help pregnant mothers who have health conditions, intra uterine surgery to correct so many genetic problems. I just think there are better choices. As humans we are better than this.

Quoting Elisabeth:

Of course, women should have rights to choose, but choose what? There is so much birth control available, so much education, so many people wanting to adopt, so many advances in medical science to help pregnant mothers who have health conditions, intra uterine surgery to correct so many genetic problems. I just think there are better choices. As humans we are better than this.

Quoting Trudy:

Quoting SERA_2005:

I don't think sterilisation is the answer here,i think education of children at a young enough age through school and parents on the value of contraception,how and where to get it from.Not just to protect the girls from pregnancy but also to protect them both from STI's.After all girls don't become pregnant on their own.

Quoting SERA_2005:

I agree women who use abortion as a form of birth control are being very careless to put in mildley but i don't think condemnation is the answer,i think education is. I am sure if you show people how to use contraception and where to get it from then they would use it. Of course to stop themselves having problems with STI's as well as to stop being in the situation where they are facing the prospect of abortion because they do not want the child.No one WANTS to be in that position.It is a very difficult place to be in i imagine and i feel very strongly that is is not up to others to sit in judgement pointing the finger.

Quoting Trudy:

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True, if talking about normal pregnancies (e.g. no rape, no genetic untreatable diseases) but education won't help when a man is overpowering you. The girl/woman knows she can get pregnant or have an STD. Should she use birth control all her life in case that very bad scenario happens? Even if she does not a have a partner? Can she force him to use a condom? I don't think so. (In fact, I know she can't force him, from own experience. And I don't mean the STD!)

Quoting Elisabeth:

Quoting SERA_2005:

Thats what i take issue with though,not what they are saying but they way in which they say it!

Quoting ciko:

just curious... is abortion banned in Christianity and Jewishness as it is in Islam?

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anladim!! and I agree!! Let's have a toast!!

Quoting SERA_2005:

Quoting SERA_2005:

Quoting AEnigma III:

Sadly, legalised abortion doesn't increase the number of abortions. Stories of backstreet abortionists in countries where it is not legal are horrific.

What I REALLY object to is multiple abortions. There is really NO EXCUSE for it. We have wonderful contraception methods and surely the trauma of one abortion would mean you would ensure you were protected in the future.

Quoting kafesteki kus:

damn right!even if sexual revolution of 60's brought this problem and demand for daily light it is still against the nature in my opinion>Trauma of abortion is terrible,if not right now after it ,it will occur later>Just a thought after talking to some women during psychotherapy who underwent it!The feeling of hopelesness,failure,lack of support from men's side and this tremendous feeling of guilt...may even lead to not enjoying sex any more!!!Gosh..we live in 21st century with all contraception benefits of it,if men think about their comfort..we THE WOMEN should think twice!!!!for men too!!!

Quoting catwoman:

Quoting kafesteki kus:

if men think about their comfort..we THE WOMEN should think twice!!!!for men too!!!

Quoting catwoman:

The popularized notion that women are so traumatized by abortion is a myth (most of the time it's her religious family and society that traumatizes the woman).

Quoting femme_fatal:

i do agree that some religious pro-life orgs dramatise the cases of after-abortion trauma insisting that every woman goes through such trauma. however, there are women who suffer after such dramatic decisions.

Quoting Bathory:

I was asking for advice not judgement!!!

Quoting Bathory:

Aenigma,

I posted my story for a ppl to tell me what they think. I can understand that you must think i am so evil and that i have no respect for life. Let me tell you something as easy as it is for you to say that why did it happen twice and i shoulc think of birthcontrol. Well no one has actuall asked me if i have used any, so why just asume that i have not used any or how could that have happend twice. If i had the answers to that i would not even be in this position. I am not asking for ppl to except what i have done, but you know what i have to live with it for the rest of my life no one els and that is all my doing. You should maybe think before you judge a person, we all do stupid things in life some not so bad and other we carry around with us the rest of our lifes. All i can say to you is that when you have rown my boat then you can come and judge. I was asking for advice not judgement!!!

Quoting Bathory:

I posted my story for a ppl to tell me what they think. I can understand that you must think i am so evil and that i have no respect for life. Let me tell you something as easy as it is for you to say that why did it happen twice and i shoulc think of birthcontrol. Well no one has actuall asked me if i have used any, so why just asume that i have not used any or how could that have happend twice. If i had the answers to that i would not even be in this position. I am not asking for ppl to except what i have done, but you know what i have to live with it for the rest of my life no one els and that is all my doing. You should maybe think before you judge a person, we all do stupid things in life some not so bad and other we carry around with us the rest of our lifes. All i can say to you is that when you have rown my boat then you can come and judge. I was asking for advice not judgement!!!

Quoting Bathory:

to all,

As i said i never asked for ppl to feel sorry for me. Everybody thinks it is so easy as 1 2 3, no one here as actually been for an abortion so why even talk about something you have no idea about. Let me tell you it is so easy to say i would have done this and i would have done that. We all are different and how many of us has been in a position to dicide to abort or not for what ever reason that may be? If i felt proud of what i have done i would not even have posted my experience. It is for some ppl so easy to hide behind the ppl that say, "you know what i have really messed up" have any of you actually looked at yourselfs and looked at your lifes? It seems to me like everyone is angels here, no one ever did anything wrong or made a mistake may it be one or two or hell even three.

Quoting femme_fatal:

Quoting SERA_2005:

This is just getting silly now. No one is perfect (including you i am sure!)and seeing as non of us know the details of the position i suggest you would do right to quit it with the finger pointing!

Quoting femme_fatal:

Quoting alameda:

This thread has taken a very cruel turn. Let's not forget there is a woman here who is suffering terribly. She doesn't need salt in her wounds. She realizes there are some problems and has asked for help.

What she needs is constructive input to help her sort out her problems.

Given the nature of sexual attraction, it's doubtful many of us here would be here if it were so easy to resist.

Quoting femme_fatal:

Quoting alameda:

From her post, it looks like he has already told her they are playing with fire, he is going to marry a Turkish woman, but he wants to still see her.

The thing is, love, what ever type of love it is, but in particular, romantic love, makes your mind melt. From a distance, when you are not in love and are thinking rationally, it's easy to see incompatibilities. Love is not rational.

When you are in love all you want is to be with your beloved......no matter what. One is drawn like the proverbial moth to the flame.

Unless he were able to divorce himself from his family and all that entails, there is no reasonable way it could work. If he were to do that, it would be just about impossible for her to fill the gap that would leave. She couldn't do it. His identity, is fused with that of his family. Taking him out of that would change who and what he is. He would become something else, and she that is not what she loves. If she changed to fit into his family and all that entails, she wouldn't be who she is now.

It's like being in the forest and picking a wildflower, only to watch it wither and fade when brought inside. It was beautiful in the woods. Enjoy it there and move on.

Quoting catwoman:

Quoting kafesteki kus:

Quoting Bathory:

I have taken my life back and it is up to me now to make the best of it. I will never trust a person with my heart or life ever again.

Quoting Bathory:

Thank you to everybody that has read my post and said what the felt and thought. I have read all of it and it has helped me to see out of the box. I was living in a dream world and i needed to wake up, it is really a huge pity that it has taken me all this distruction to myself and doing wrong things without thinking of myself and what is right. I have made a dissision and i have cut out the cancer that was eating me up. It is going to take a very long time for me to work through the things i have done and the things that has been done to me, but i am sure that it cant rain all the time. I have taken my life back and it is up to me now to make the best of it. I will never trust a person with my heart or life ever again.

Quoting Bathory:

Thank you to everybody that has read my post and said what the felt and thought. I have read all of it and it has helped me to see out of the box. I was living in a dream world and i needed to wake up, it is really a huge pity that it has taken me all this distruction to myself and doing wrong things without thinking of myself and what is right. I have made a dissision and i have cut out the cancer that was eating me up. It is going to take a very long time for me to work through the things i have done and the things that has been done to me, but i am sure that it cant rain all the time. I have taken my life back and it is up to me now to make the best of it. I will never trust a person with my heart or life ever again.

Quoting Bathory:

Thanks for the support guys. I have written a letter to him and i am just waiting for a translation and that will be the end of a very sad chapter in my life and the beginning of all good things to come as i will be in control of my life.

Quoting Bathory:

Thanks for the support guys. I have written a letter to him and i am just waiting for a translation and that will be the end of a very sad chapter in my life and the beginning of all good things to come as i will be in control of my life.

Quoting Bathory:

Thank you to everybody that has read my post and said what the felt and thought. I have read all of it and it has helped me to see out of the box. I was living in a dream world and i needed to wake up, it is really a huge pity that it has taken me all this distruction to myself and doing wrong things without thinking of myself and what is right. I have made a dissision and i have cut out the cancer that was eating me up. It is going to take a very long time for me to work through the things i have done and the things that has been done to me, but i am sure that it cant rain all the time. I have taken my life back and it is up to me now to make the best of it. I will never trust a person with my heart or life ever again.

Quoting portokal:

Quoting kafesteki kus:

Portokal,Portokal!!!just a prince from Transylvania????!!!!With this nick she should measure higher))))up to a king.You seem to have forgotten about another Bathory))))Stephen Bathory
iyi sanslar for all

Quoting portokal:

Quoting portokal:

Quoting portokal: Quoting kafesteki kus: Portokal,Portokal!!!just a prince from Transylvania????!!!!With this nick she should measure higher))))up to a king.You seem to have forgotten about another Bathory))))Stephen Bathory iyi sanslar for all What do you mean by JUST? He was borned in the Principate of Transylvania . Was a prince, later become king. He died in deception.

Quoting kafesteki kus:

Quoting portokal: Quoting portokal: Quoting kafesteki kus: Portokal,Portokal!!!just a prince from Transylvania????!!!!With this nick she should measure higher))))up to a king.You seem to have forgotten about another Bathory))))Stephen Bathory iyi sanslar for all What do you mean by JUST? He was borned in the Principate of Transylvania . Was a prince, later become king. He died in deception. Actually, what was wrong with this independent principate? Soething must have been, since it gave Bathory to polish. and Mutteferrika to turks...

Quoting kafesteki kus:

what a historical european input Stephen had as a Polish king)))))Anyway,both were courageous))))haha

Quoting femme_fatal: