We weren´t talking about running into somebody. It was about especially going to somebody and visiting them. My partner met all my uncles and aunts at a family party. You don´t normally bring your friends to family parties (like a wedding, aniversy, etc.) so if you would bring "just a friend" there you would say, in my case "this is my friend Soandso" and not "this is Soandso"... the latter would make my family think he´s my love interest. I don´t appreciate my family being called backwards for that assumption.

Backwards is the assumption that if you introduce somebody to your family, it must mean you´re more than friends. The girl clearly writes here that they´ll spend some time at his uncle´s and then go to his house. Is it only your fiancee that can stay at your uncle´s? Have you ever been on a holiday with a male friend? I have and when we were near a city where my family lives we´d visit them.

It´s ridiculous of you to take offence at what I say. If having a friend around means your family thinks you´re getting married, it does sound backwards to me. If you don´t consider it backwards - that´s your opinion. You know, some people consider arranging marriages for 12 year olds not backwards. I just disagree. To each their own

And stop coming up with situational rules. First it was meeting the parents, then uncles and aunts, then meeting them in a situation different than accidental and, finally, going to family celebrations. I wasn´t aware it is considered inappropriate to bring a friend to a wedding in the Netherlands. A friend you don´t sleep with, that is. Or, shall we now exclude weddings from the list of family celebrations only bfs can go to?

You know what, I think you totally agree with me, you just got so far in denial that you feel like you have to persevere in a pointless discussion although you´re losing legs to stand on 

you didn`t say anything about sex and I wasn`t exactly referring to the content of your post, but the general mentality. you seem to call anything unlike your culture backwards anyway.

and what´s my culture exactly? I wouldn´t call Poland a very modern country in many aspects, like the attitude to homosexuality, race or religion. And there are lots of stereotypes present there that should be changed. So, no. I don´t consider my home country´s culture modern and progressive.

True, it´s way better than the culture in countries where people who change their religion get killed, women get stonned for petty reasons or where men have more legal rights than women.

Besides, I´m backwards in some of my believes as well.

I didn`t know where you are from and in this case I don`t think it`s relevant anyway. I also don`t get what my post has to do with those killed for their religion but I completely agree with you. Here are some examples of those horrible atrocities; women burnt alive in Kenya for "witchcraft" http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=dae_1236854361 cab driver gets stabbed for being muslim in America; http://unionreview.com/ny-cab-driver-stabbed-being-muslim woman gets stabbed to death for being muslim in germany; http://www.spiegel.de/international/0,1518,344374,00.html

I agree, possibly DD was testing something i guess

I would definitely not call Kenya a developed modern country so I absolutely agree it´s an example of backwards mentality. The acts of violence in the US or Germany have nothing to do with these countries being backwards or modern - these actions are crimes against the law and perpetrators will or have been judged and sentenced. I was referring to countries whose legal systems promote backwards ideas like "men are allowed more because of their gender or where people are prosecuted (by law) for converting or where homosexuality is a crime.

Everywhere in the world, in all communities there are people whoare prejudiced and hate other people on any basis possible. But there arent too many countries that pass laws that empower prejudice. And this, in my opinion, should be condemned.

I don´t understand why for you the word "modern" is instantly associated with nudity and sex. It has nothing to do with it. Would it be more modern to sentence people to death for enjoying their sexuality with other adult people who consent to it?

please don`t try to twist my point. It`s you who is simplifying modernity down to nudity and sex not me. As for Kenya`s being an undeveloped country, should we ignore the oppression against women there because they are not a developed country? Iran is undeveloped too, but you make a big fuss about what`s going on there. why are you so concerned about the women killed in Iran but not those killed in Kenya?

Edited (9/13/2010) by Arafta

Are you sure we read the same posts? because I get the feeling we get different things.

1. Who said anything about sex/nudity first?

.....Arafata!

quote:

"wait! isn`t that so backwards? I love this attitude of "I show more flesh and I have more sex so I`m moderner than thou" "

and again:

"you didn`t say anything about sex and I wasn`t exactly referring to the content of your post, but the general mentality."

I was only saying you can have male friends, you showed up with your sarcastic rremark about nudity being modern

2. Of course we shouldn´t agree oppression of women in Kenya! That´s why I agreed with you. We should condemn things that go on in Kenya, Iran, saudi Arabia, Emirates (hmm they´re not really underdeveloped, are they? ).

I said Kenya´s example is not an example of how a modern country should look like as it is not a modern country by far. Hmm who was it that mentioned Kenya in the context of inequality when I took a stab at The Arabic States of Mysoginy?

.....Arafata!

See? My point is that the ideas that make people believe they´re better than others because they have a penis, are backwards. And living your life according to an old book* that promotes inequality, paedophilia, homophobia and blodshed is backwards

* by book I meant both Bible and Qu´ran

But, what is more backwards, is when countries adapt their legal system to make things easier to only one group on the basis of belief in an imaginary, invisible being. If you can die in a perfectly legal way only because you say that you find it ridiculous - that´s not very funny. It´s backwards and should not occur in 21st century.

But if your idea of what is modern and backwards differs from mine, I´m all ears, I´d love to hear it.

first off all, what is "arafata"? second of all, none of the countries you mentioned are considered to be developed countries. high gdp per capita does not necessarily equal economic development. why did I mention about Kenya? Because Kenya is a christian country and those who kill women there are christians, yet we will never hear that story in the media. I`m just pointing out your hypocrisy. I wish you cared about those christian Kenyan women as much as you cared about the Iranian women. and yes, my idea of what is modern or backwards is far from your bigotted and eurocentric interpretation. Don`t you call those who wear western/christian style clothes "modern" while labeling anyone who doesn`t wear like you "traditional"? This is just an example.

Edited (9/13/2010) by Arafta