Hi lyndie
I couldnt agree more with what your saying i would just like to think that there are some turkish men who are faithful and dont want to run around cheating on their english girlfriends.All i know is that i have yet to find one and i know what i am talking about!

Hi Sera,
I don't think the boys really see themselves as 'cheating' on their English gf's at all. I know a boy who was engaged to be married to someone in Europe. Offf he loved her so much. He told me once that even when she was in the room with him, he would miss her, just thinking about when she left. He was never faithfull to her when she went back home, but he couldn't see that he wasn't faithful. He said he 'loved' her and that was all that mattered, when they were together he would be faithful and when they were apart, he would do what he liked. Bless him, he really couldn't understand why this was so strange.

He just didn't see it as cheating! She of course had other ideas and she dumped his a***. His whole world fell apart! He couldn't understand it. Even 1 year later he still says he 'loves' her.

Again, just as there is a difference betweent he meaning of love, I think the concept of fidelity is also different.

Hi Lyndie,
I think there may be some truth in what your saying.I have lots and lots of guy friends in Turkey and i talk to them about their english gf's.They say they love them or at least 1 or 2 of their gf's anyway but they go around sleeping with other women.As you say quite rightly english girls would consider that cheating as the girl did that you refer to in your pervious post.When i talk to my friends about this they say things like ''oh no it doesnt matter,its only sex for me'' Like they can some how separate their loving relationship from casual sex with random girls whom they find attractive.
I Mean i speak from experience i went out with a turkish guy for 2 years and i thought we were doing ok but then i started to hear things from different girls online about him going with other people and those girls had also been told they were were his only one and there were no others.I confronted him about this naturally and he denied all knowledge of these girls told me that i was to ignore all the messages on the net because these girls were ''jealous'' and ''wanted to break us up'' so being naive i went along with this for a little while.Then the messages about his ''infidelity'' came thicker and faster i began to think maybe i was being majorly played.I asked him about it again,he told me if i couldnt trust him then we would be finished.Thinking back on it now it makes me laugh how he thought he could get away with making me look like the guilty party when i wasnt at all.Anyways we broke up about 4 months later and that was about a year and a half ago.I have found out since then that he is married to a kurdish woman they have a 3 year old son together which would mean she had the child when i was supposedly in a relationship with him.So as well as keeping his poor wife in the dark it looks like there were 5 maybe more english women whom he regularly went with and to the best of my knowledge his wife still is non the wiser.Worst of all i am very very good friends with all his brothers and they knew what was happening but didnt say a word!
This shows me that they certainly do have differing concepts of love and fidelity i just hope that nobody else experiences the full impact of those differences to the extent that i did.

ok everyone... i cant even believe that we are going into this much depth about the words "i love you".. "seni seviyorum" whatever.. surely we shouldnt believe it until they actually prove it anyway ha?

o dear... what a mess

"Come to think of it, is it so bad the way they do things in Turkey. Who knows how long love will last whether it is 'true' love in the European sense, or 'passing' love in the turkish boy sense. You can marry someone from your own culture, believe they love you and within a few years they treat you like dirt, run around with every other girl they see, drink too much and beat you!"

Lyndie this is SO true! I believe that these men can feel 'passing love' and really mean it. Is that not one of the best times in love? That excitement of being attracted to someone, getting to know them better, when everything is new. It is a joy and should be enjoyed. Young girls should also enjoy this too and not be so quick to whine and complain and suffocate their boyfriends - perhaps then they would find the boyfriends stay around longer anyway!

and to add to all of this.. isnt "love" different for every individual??

ceyda i dont agree with you....and as ceyda as.......

Oh there they go again! Fighting online as always our TC site'love birds'

u know this is the world's law ... everytime women expect men to prove sth. and in this topic it seems so, tooo