in response to the previous post, i would just like to say, that yes of course there are exceptions
to this sterotype. I met my now husband in a tourist resort, he was working for his uncle for the summer and was still at school.
we have now been together for 5 years, married for nearly two, and in that time he has proved to be resonsible, genuine and respectful.
he is a good husband to me and a great dad to our daughter.
Yes the sterotype certainly does exist but there also certainly are exceptions, if if they are rare!

Upon request I have added its Turkish translation to my post on page one.

Thank you for an encouraging reply Kimberley. It's great that you have such a wonderful story of success.
My boyfriend has a colourful past, he admits that, but I don't want to be classed as unethical or easy simply because I am Western, when in fact I am ethical status. My boyfriend told me that I remind him of Turkish girls because of this, but reading such bad things is very discourageing, it makes me worry that I'm just fun on the side. Yes, I've learnt that his friends are very important to him as is work, we speak a little on MSN each night, but now I won't hear from him for 20 days because he has work to do apparently. I could mistake this for him not caring, but I know that from his lazy-love personality love is in his heart but takes a back seat.I've heard the signs that these men aren't in love- now what are the signs that they do actually care?
I also want to make it clear that it is very unfortunate that some decent Western women are classed as easy fun and naive, just as it is unfortunate that so many Turkish men are given such a terrible reputation by generalisation.

In response to the entries in this forum, I must first say, aferin! It is my understanding that the purpose of this site is to learn about Turkish people, language, and culture. I think the posts here have been heartfelt, educational, and true to the goals of this site.

The discussion has expanded to include observations which demonstrate how much we all have in common. We are all self-serving at times, no matter what cultural roots spawned us. Men are men, and women are women, no matter where they come from. The differences, and similarities are fascinating, and will always make for an interesting discussion. It is important not to lose sight of the benefits of this open forum. Being politically correct, or overly polite can defeat the purpose of learning about each other. So I say, thank you erdinc for your candid remarks, and thank you mltm for starting the discussion.

Personally, I have learned from reading the posts that we can speak our minds here without fear of reprisal, as long as our intent is to educate, and not to denigrate.

Wow! What an eloquent, articulate and well balanced post! I am sure you will be a great asset to this site Ladywriter. Some of the posts were starting to sound like idealistic schmultzy interviews in a Miss World contest

Adios...

Thank you for the nice compliment, Aenigma. I can only imagine the sound of all the dictionary pages turning in search of the translation for the word, "schmaltzy". Heheh...a little chicken fat is always tasty.

My daughter is 16 and 100% innocent. she met her boyfriend whilst on holiday in Turkey last July. We returned to Turkey in October to see him again.

He is a resort worker, with impecable manners. He never once asked her for anything, (money, phones nothing).

I was worried because she was so young and he was a gorgeous 19 year old. But he treated her with respect at all times never expecting anything from her, and I mean anything on either visit. They speak to each other all the time on msn and phone each other regularly.

Her Dad and I like him very much. He will go in the army soon, and I know she will miss him very much then. But she is very young yet and only time will tell. But I have to say he was very different from most of the boys we met whilst on holiday.

That is so lovely to hear, it's a similar situation to my cousin, although they don't speak on the phone and he sometimes is not able to contact. Of course there are exceptions, and I wish your daughter the very best of luck and happiness. It can be very difficult to hold on to a relationship when everyone tells you that you will only get hurt by staying with that person. That is why it's a shame that there are so many stereotypes in the world today.
And yes, I add also that from my knowledge (which is little, I admit), these men do work very hard.