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Please explane why????
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| 80. |
19 Oct 2007 Fri 11:16 pm |
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Quoting Bathory:
I posted my story for a ppl to tell me what they think. I can understand that you must think i am so evil and that i have no respect for life. Let me tell you something as easy as it is for you to say that why did it happen twice and i shoulc think of birthcontrol. Well no one has actuall asked me if i have used any, so why just asume that i have not used any or how could that have happend twice. If i had the answers to that i would not even be in this position. I am not asking for ppl to except what i have done, but you know what i have to live with it for the rest of my life no one els and that is all my doing. You should maybe think before you judge a person, we all do stupid things in life some not so bad and other we carry around with us the rest of our lifes. All i can say to you is that when you have rown my boat then you can come and judge. I was asking for advice not judgement!!! |
I totally agree,this is what i have been saying all along and i want you to know not everyone here judges you for what happened. Some people want to be supportive and others are just not helpful at all!
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| 81. |
19 Oct 2007 Fri 11:20 pm |
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to all,
As i said i never asked for ppl to feel sorry for me. Everybody thinks it is so easy as 1 2 3, no one here as actually been for an abortion so why even talk about something you have no idea about. Let me tell you it is so easy to say i would have done this and i would have done that. We all are different and how many of us has been in a position to dicide to abort or not for what ever reason that may be? If i felt proud of what i have done i would not even have posted my experience. It is for some ppl so easy to hide behind the ppl that say, "you know what i have really messed up" have any of you actually looked at yourselfs and looked at your lifes? It seems to me like everyone is angels here, no one ever did anything wrong or made a mistake may it be one or two or hell even three.
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| 82. |
19 Oct 2007 Fri 11:23 pm |
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Hi Bathory. 
Nice to see you.
Hope things are going better now.
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| 83. |
19 Oct 2007 Fri 11:30 pm |
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Quoting Bathory: to all,
As i said i never asked for ppl to feel sorry for me. Everybody thinks it is so easy as 1 2 3, no one here as actually been for an abortion so why even talk about something you have no idea about. Let me tell you it is so easy to say i would have done this and i would have done that. We all are different and how many of us has been in a position to dicide to abort or not for what ever reason that may be? If i felt proud of what i have done i would not even have posted my experience. It is for some ppl so easy to hide behind the ppl that say, "you know what i have really messed up" have any of you actually looked at yourselfs and looked at your lifes? It seems to me like everyone is angels here, no one ever did anything wrong or made a mistake may it be one or two or hell even three. |
about mistakes, we know, we all make them, thats not the problem. the problem is some of us learn, and some of us dont. he tells you to kill your children and comes back to tell you that you dont fit each other? and you still want him?
maybe some of us have no conscience at all.
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| 84. |
19 Oct 2007 Fri 11:35 pm |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting Bathory: to all,
As i said i never asked for ppl to feel sorry for me. Everybody thinks it is so easy as 1 2 3, no one here as actually been for an abortion so why even talk about something you have no idea about. Let me tell you it is so easy to say i would have done this and i would have done that. We all are different and how many of us has been in a position to dicide to abort or not for what ever reason that may be? If i felt proud of what i have done i would not even have posted my experience. It is for some ppl so easy to hide behind the ppl that say, "you know what i have really messed up" have any of you actually looked at yourselfs and looked at your lifes? It seems to me like everyone is angels here, no one ever did anything wrong or made a mistake may it be one or two or hell even three. |
about mistakes, we know, we all make them, thats not the problem. the problem is some of us learn, and some of us dont. he tells you to kill your children and comes back to tell you that you dont fit each other? and you still want him?
maybe some of us have no conscience at all.
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This is just getting silly now. No one is perfect (including you i am sure!)and seeing as non of us know the details of the position i suggest you would do right to quit it with the finger pointing!
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| 85. |
19 Oct 2007 Fri 11:48 pm |
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Quoting SERA_2005:
This is just getting silly now. No one is perfect (including you i am sure!)and seeing as non of us know the details of the position i suggest you would do right to quit it with the finger pointing! |
is it so painful now? do my posts hurt you?
sure it doesnt hurt to enjoy an easy lifestyle. but it hurts when it comes for things like responsibilities, right?
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| 86. |
20 Oct 2007 Sat 12:07 am |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting SERA_2005:
This is just getting silly now. No one is perfect (including you i am sure!)and seeing as non of us know the details of the position i suggest you would do right to quit it with the finger pointing! |
is it so painful now? do my posts hurt you?
sure it doesnt hurt to enjoy an easy lifestyle. but it hurts when it comes for things like responsibilities, right?
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In case you have forgotten this thread isnt about me or you!
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| 87. |
20 Oct 2007 Sat 12:56 am |
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This thread has taken a very cruel turn. Let's not forget there is a woman here who is suffering terribly. She doesn't need salt in her wounds. She realizes there are some problems and has asked for help.
What she needs is constructive input to help her sort out her problems.
Given the nature of sexual attraction, it's doubtful many of us here would be here if it were so easy to resist.
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| 88. |
20 Oct 2007 Sat 12:58 am |
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Quoting alameda: This thread has taken a very cruel turn. Let's not forget there is a woman here who is suffering terribly. She doesn't need salt in her wounds. She realizes there are some problems and has asked for help.
What she needs is constructive input to help her sort out her problems.
Given the nature of sexual attraction, it's doubtful many of us here would be here if it were so easy to resist. |
very well put.
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| 89. |
20 Oct 2007 Sat 01:28 am |
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Quoting femme_fatal: Quoting Bathory: I was asking for advice not judgement!!! |
an advice often goes along with a judgement
there was a mistake, and was another, but you seem didnt learn anything. instead of dunmping the bastard that told you abort your unborn children you still running after him.
to my personal opinion, you definetely deserve a judgement if not from aenigma then from me.
what did you expect a gentle stroke on your head and 'oh dear, you are a poor thing, we wish he loved you, and two abortions are nothing in comparison to that lovely man'?
disgusting!  |
The problem is that if we put our judgment this way, it won't help the person that needs help, it only relieves our own anger. You can let her know that you think she should deeply reconsider her relationship with this man because as you see it, there's nothing to try to understand about him and he has shown multiple signs of terribly needing to be dumped - without using words like 'disgusting'.
Bathory, I think that you're asking for more trouble if you still want to be with this man. Maybe there are great things about him, but if people disrespect our feelings in a relationship, they really need to be out of our lives. If he was a serious man, he wouldn't be playing with you and giving you unclear messages about his intentions. As difficult as it may be, I really think that you should move on with your life without him. Maybe you should start by asking yourself why you still want him?
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| 90. |
20 Oct 2007 Sat 02:29 am |
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From her post, it looks like he has already told her they are playing with fire, he is going to marry a Turkish woman, but he wants to still see her.
The thing is, love, what ever type of love it is, but in particular, romantic love, makes your mind melt. From a distance, when you are not in love and are thinking rationally, it's easy to see incompatibilities. Love is not rational.
When you are in love all you want is to be with your beloved......no matter what. One is drawn like the proverbial moth to the flame.
Unless he were able to divorce himself from his family and all that entails, there is no reasonable way it could work. If he were to do that, it would be just about impossible for her to fill the gap that would leave. She couldn't do it. His identity, is fused with that of his family. Taking him out of that would change who and what he is. He would become something else, and she that is not what she loves. If she changed to fit into his family and all that entails, she wouldn't be who she is now.
It's like being in the forest and picking a wildflower, only to watch it wither and fade when brought inside. It was beautiful in the woods. Enjoy it there and move on.
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