5464. |
09 Apr 2006 Sun 02:39 pm |
Quoting ziska: People can someone of you nature Turks tell me about weddings in Turkey!!!PLs I am planning to marry one turkish guy and don t know anything about customs there!If anyone knows something just share with us ,ok?!
Tessekur ederim!!! |
I think Lyndie's post was very clarifying and true in many ways, but i think everybody here forgets one thing:
If i read this post, i feel like i could have written it. And i would have done it from this point of view:
- I'm deeply in love with Kadir and we had conversations about marrying. But the conclusion was, that it's in too far future to discuss about it. We don't know what life wil bring us, therefore we don't want to get attached to eachother with such a sacred thing.
- Thóugh we don't exactly plan to marry (i'm not his fiancee, he hasn't proposed, we laid this decision in the hands of time and put it in the futue), i am very willing to marry this man, as he matches my needs. Ofcourse i have to adapt and learn to understand the culture, but Kadir has told me (last night really ) that he doesn't want to crash my culture, so we will find 'our culture'.
- But i do feel the needs to be as beautiful as i can be in his eyes. I feel the need to please him, to surprise him. And therefore it could have been me asking about turkish wedding customs, just to surprise my man by the fact i actually took the time and consideration to think about such an important and sacred decision in our (love)life.
Who knows, maybe Ziska felt the same, maybe she wanted to do something for her love, before he would enlighten her. Maybe they won't get married tomorrow or next month, maybe she's like me: willing and eager to learn the other culture, in order to be prepared for that marriage, once it comes upon our ways.
The best way, is to prepare together with your love, but i think, as I will be the one who has to learn the most and has to grow acquainted (how to type?) with the culture and its people, i will try to be one step ahead of discussions and talks, so that Kadir won't have to explain everything ovr and over again to me. Because I am sure that loving me, no being with me, is difficult for him too. I might be moving to hÃs country, but i will come with mý values and he has to get usedto them too.
If Ziska is not like i just tried to describe, i recommend everybody to read Lynda's post once again
Sophie, forgive me for using his name again and telling about my stuff, but i thought was appropriate for this discussion
btw, mum is making us mousaka for tonight
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