Welcome
Login:   Pass:     Register - Forgot Password - Resend Activation

Turkish Class Forums / General/Off-topic

General/Off-topic

Add reply to this discussion
Jokes and riddles
(518 Messages in 52 pages - View all)
1 2 [3] 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 ...  >>
20.       catwoman
8933 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 09:46 am

Politically Correct Descriptions For Men

He does not have a BEER GUT.
He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.

He is not a BAD DANCER.
He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME.
He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.

He is not BALDING.
He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

He is not a CRADLE ROBBER.
He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.

He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK.
He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

He does not act like a TOTAL ASS.
He develops a case of RECTAL-ANAL INVERSION.

He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG.
He has SWINE EMPATHY.

He is not afraid of COMMITMENT.
He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.

He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES.
He has an INTROSPECTIVE GRAPHIC MOMENT.

21.       catwoman
8933 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 09:47 am

Men Are Like...

... Blenders.
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

... Chocolate Bars.
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

... Coffee.
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

... Commercials.
You can't believe a word they say.

... Computers.
Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

... Coolers.
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

... Copiers.
You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.

... Curling Irons.
They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

... Government Bonds.
They take way too long to mature.

... Horoscopes.
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

... Lava Lamps.
Fun to look at, but not all that bright.

... Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

... Parking Spots.
The good ones are already taken and the ones that are left are either handicapped or extremely small.

... Popcorn.
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

... Weather.
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

22.       catwoman
8933 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 09:49 am

Great Advice to Pass on to Your Daughters

1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

5. Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.

10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.

14. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

15. Sadly, all men are created equal...

23.       peacetrain
1905 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 11:17 am

Two women talking at a weight loss class.

first woman: I've already lost 168 pounds.

second woman : wow what's your secret?

first woman: I divorced it





Doctor: congratulations! You are going to have ababy.

Blonde: Is it mine?

24.       alameda
3499 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 07:42 pm

You know ladies, these are rather chauvinistic jokes. How would you like it if the word woman was used instead of man?

25.       AEnigma III
0 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 11:38 pm

Catwoman, I thought you were against all this man-hating crap?

26.       AEnigma III
0 posts
 31 Jan 2008 Thu 11:43 pm

Quoting alameda:

You know ladies, these are rather chauvinistic jokes. How would you like it if the word woman was used instead of man?



Exactly :-S

27.       catwoman
8933 posts
 01 Feb 2008 Fri 12:08 am

Quoting AEnigma III:

Catwoman, I thought you were against all this man-hating crap?


How is this man hating? These are jokes based on stereotypes, chill out. At least they are not rude, like some of the jokes about women. If you are ok with jokes about women, then it's also ok to make jokes about men.

28.       AEnigma III
0 posts
 01 Feb 2008 Fri 12:15 am

Quoting catwoman:

How is this man hating? These are jokes based on stereotypes, chill out. At least they are not rude, like some of the jokes about women. If you are ok with jokes about women, then it's also ok to make jokes about men.



"Men are all pigs" not insulting? Actually I hate all gender jokes, and I am suprised you don't. Most of them reinforce stereotypical roles of men and women (i.e. men expecting women to cook dinner blah blah blah blah).

Yuck

29.       AEnigma III
0 posts
 01 Feb 2008 Fri 12:22 am



Quoting catwoman:

These are jokes based on stereotypes, chill out. At least they are not rude, like some of the jokes about women.




Quoting catwoman:

Quoting Trudy:

To all the men I loved (and everyone else):

"Women are suprised how much men do forget. Men are surprised how much women do remember."



Trudy... I hate sexist jokes/comments/quotes

30.       catwoman
8933 posts
 01 Feb 2008 Fri 12:25 am

Quoting AEnigma III:

Quoting catwoman:

How is this man hating? These are jokes based on stereotypes, chill out. At least they are not rude, like some of the jokes about women. If you are ok with jokes about women, then it's also ok to make jokes about men.



"Men are all pigs" not insulting? Actually I hate all gender jokes, and I am suprised you don't. Most of them reinforce stereotypical roles of men and women (i.e. men expecting women to cook dinner blah blah blah blah).

Yuck


What are you trying to prove canim? Yes, I hate stereotypical jokes too, but if you can't beat them, join them. In a perfect world I'd never make a stereotypical gender joke, but as long as men make sexist jokes about women, it's ok to make sexist jokes about men.

(518 Messages in 52 pages - View all)
1 2 [3] 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 ...  >>
Add reply to this discussion




Turkish Dictionary
Turkish Chat
Open mini chat
New in Forums
24 HOUR FLASH SALE for learning Turkish e-...
qdemir: ...
Grammar Textbook
qdemir: ...
E-T: I see you have done this before?
harp00n: Bunu ... daha önce de ... Bu konuda iyi olduğun ç...
E-T: It´s one of the things on my bu...
denizli: hmmm I ... think there are suffixes ... nor ... But I know wha...
T-E
og2009: ...
T-E
og2009: ...
coronavirus
og2009: ...
OUR FRIENDS
og2009: ...
Coronavirus
harp00n: ...
TLC servers hacked, all user emails & pass...
alerque: This sites entire user database seems to have been hacked, I´m ...
T-E
og2009: ...
Individually Tailored Private Turkish Less...
sumrutemur: Do you want to learn Turkish? Do you want to improve your speaking, wr...
Random Pictures of Turkey
Add thumbnails like this to your site
Most liked