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My mother-in-law always says ´otur´ to me when I get up to help clear after we have eaten. I must say though that she always says it in a nice way and to me it doesn´t sound like a command.
Sometimes I sit back down if other members of the family have come to see me but quite often I don´t do as she says because I like to help with the washing up etc...am I wrong in doing this??
when older people adress to the younger (like your mother-in-law to you), they usually don´t use the formal way, i.e. "siz". So it is not rude when she tells you "otur". But to someone you have just met or to an elder person you should say "siz oturun lütfen", etc. (And yes, in this case generally the personal pronoun is also used).
And I agree that you don´t sit and help her with washing, etc. I know that although they usually say "you sit, I do these", they actually would be pleased if you help  I know from my mother and sister-in-law
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It is good to know what is used more frequently.